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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

My 2yo refuses to eat because she says her food is too hot

19 replies

kerry85 · 12/12/2013 19:54

My 2yo daughter has started refusing to eat her meals as she says its too hot. It's not!

She watches me serve her meal and put it on the kitchen window sill to cool. When we sit at the table I then blow it cool. It's practically cold by this point and she still won't eat it saying its hot.

It all started about 6 months ago, we went to a cafe and when her food arrived it was boiling and she burnt her mouth. After that she started saying it was hot but over the past few weeks its got much worse!!

This evening I gave her soup and crusty bread and she started screaming saying it was hot, it wasn't. I might as well have poured it straight from the can it was that cool!
I got so angry I grabbed the soup and bread and threw it all into the sink :( I ended up shouting telling her I wouldn't give her hot food! And removed her from the table.

What can I do? I don't want this to get any worse, please help

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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CMOTDibbler · 12/12/2013 20:01

Don't faff around putting it on the window sill and blowing it. Put it on a plate, then in front of her and ignore anything but good behaviour. Eat your food and don't react to any fuss - if she doesn't eat it, remove without comment and move on.

Original poster

kerry85 · 12/12/2013 20:04

Thank you I will definitely do that.
I just don't know what to do now though because I worry that she might wake up during the night or really early in the morning because she's hungry. Do I give her something now before bed or just leave it?

OP posts:

porpentine · 12/12/2013 20:10

Mine does this! I thought it was just us. Don't really have a solution though, except I don't think he always literally means 'hot' (as you say, sometimes it's virtually stone cold...) Sometimes I think he just wants a bit of attention so I blow on it and feed it to him; doesn't always work though.

Sid77 · 12/12/2013 20:11

I think that this is a common thing. My DS used to do it and still does to an extent (is now just turned 3). We make minimal fuss and have just taught him to wait and eat a little at a time rather than a massive mouthful. He's also like it with stuff that's too cold - he's only just accepted that ice cream is nice and not the work of the devil...

DrivingToDistraction · 12/12/2013 20:12

We had a bit of this until we introduced the word 'warm' and now DS is an expert at determining whether something is hot or merely warm. It was like he didn't have an understanding of the state between hot and cold until he had the word for it.

Original poster

kerry85 · 12/12/2013 20:26

Thanks guys and I will definitely start using the word 'warm' :) and in future I will not to rise to it!

OP posts:

notsomuchroomattheinn · 12/12/2013 20:37

Ignore, ignore, ignore! But first check she knows what hot means DS2 says hot but he means cold

Twattergy · 12/12/2013 20:46

When my son does This I tell him to touch the food to see that it's only warm.this tends to work as he knows for sure thern that it's fine. I think it's fair enough for them to check for themselves. He's just turned two.

nosoupforyou · 12/12/2013 20:50

My 2 yr old DS does this too. I just patiently suggest he waits and get on with eating. He eventually starts eating too.

Love the idea of teaching him 'warm' - definitely trying that. thanks!

themummyonthebus · 12/12/2013 20:58

We've had this with DC1. W taught him to blow on his food and each mouthful. W tried to get him to take smaller mouthfuls but that seems to be beyond him so if he takes a first mouthful then complains about the temperature we tell him to now on it and wait and we carry on eating.

Definitely agree about "warm". He wouldn't drink hot chocolate for ages until I started calling it warm chocolate!

themummyonthebus · 12/12/2013 20:58

*blow on it

Original poster

kerry85 · 12/12/2013 21:18

"Warm chocolate" made me chuckle!

OP posts:

PrincessScrumpy · 12/12/2013 21:35

dd1 was like this - including her bath which basically had to be tepid or she'd cry it was burning her. She only started warmer baths after the sisters were born and she'd want to get in with them. I think at this age they aren't quite sure what to say but know what works. dtd1 will only eat meat that is ham (she's 2yo). In our house we have ham, ham beef, ham chicken etc, which dd1 finds hilarious. dtds blow on their food no problem, dd1 is 5yo and still asks me to blow!

NotCitrus · 12/12/2013 21:41

My ds did this as the only word he knew to explain he didn't like something was 'hot' - and later 'cold' - I spent ages once heating up milk that was repeatedly rejected as being 'cold' until I tasted it and realised it had gone off but he didn't have the words. But he really does prefer non-hot food - and cream of tomato soup straight from the can is still preferred to it being heated.

It amuses me when he now opines "this is nice and warm, isn't it?" about all manner of things, like an elderly man. He's five!

NoMoreMarbles · 12/12/2013 22:02

My DD prefers her food cold and would rather all her food is served unheated! I draw the line at roast dinner being cold (it has to be heated to cook the meat-is what I tell her) but other than that beans on toast (toast left to go bone cold) or soup etc sandwiches, pasta (cooked and left to go cold) all freezing cold...

Incidentally she also drank any bottles she had after I weaned her off the breast, cold from the fridge as she wouldn't drink anything/eat anything heated up from about 6-12 months old.

She is 7yo now try letting her help 'cook' her food and give her her dinner unheated and leave her to try it. Dont make a big deal if she refuses to try it and just make sure there are plenty of other things for her to eat (fruit, veg etc)

brettgirl2 · 13/12/2013 07:45

My four year old still sits without eating to wait for it to cool. The other day she said something about the food being nice warm so perhaps we're making progress at last. Just give it to her and leave her to it is my advice.

Prozacbear · 13/12/2013 09:53

Totally agree about the word 'warm' - works wonders on the bath too!

It's interesting reading this thread, DS (2.9) has only just in the last couple of months wanted his bedtime milk warm - before he drank it straight from the fridge. And he will only now tolerate a warm bath - "ooh, lovely and warm" though both are significantly colder than I'd have them.

It must be survival instinct - better to be a bit too cold than burned!

rrreow · 13/12/2013 12:33

My son went through a phase like this. Everything not stone cold would be 'hot'. I just make a comment like "Oh really? Well, you can blow on it to help it cool down" in a slightly disinterested tone of voice. Don't get into a rational argument about whether it is hot or not.

FeralGirlCambs · 13/12/2013 14:35

I had no idea this was so common! We have 'little bit hot', 'tiny bit hot', 'too 'ot, wait minute' etc etc ad nauseam. And most meat is ham here too. No advice, just a shared at the ways of toddlers!

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