What time should an 8 month old go to bed and how do you stop the breastfeeding to sleep habit.

[sneezecakesmum]

My lovely DD (adult!) has got into the routine of bfing to sleep, co sleeping and letting DGS use her as a dummy several times at night and taking him to bed around 9pm. He's awake at 5.30 am

Firstly I am not an interfering old bag of a mother! I'm all for bfing and co sleeping but DD herself is fed up with the night waking and thinks the all night co sleeping is just encouraging the dummy effect. She would like to get him into his cot, at least for the first half of the night, and at an earlier time.

He has 2 long naps or 3 short ones and is knackered at 6 pm. I've suggested a bf at 6 and putting him straight in his cot, where he will hopefully grizzle for a few minutes and settle. We don't believe in 'cry it out' so please don't go there

Is there a consensus of bed times for 8 months old? And how do you stop the dummying all night? I bfed and co slept with DD but can't remember how I achieved freedom independence at night

Msmiggins. I AP'd (bf, co slept, sling) with my DCs way back before it even had a name, and totally agree with it being the only way to all get a good nights sleep . The problem DD is having I think is between the older boy who has cerebral palsy, waking every night for 5 years and the baby fussing all night, it's made her a light sleeper and she just can't settle.

She is on the school run but I'll text her so she can see the replies.

No dummy sadly, we did try but no luck.

I listen of course to her problems, but she wants practical advice. The transfer to cot after 15 minutes is exactly the thing

It's not imperative he goes into the cot, it's just safer while he is so small, and I think if the cot solution doesn't work it will be a mattress on the floor. It worked well with the 5 year old so it's not unchartered territory.

To me bluecheese, your routine seems nearest to what she is trying for and the gentlest way for her and the baby. The sleeping bag is a good idea as he pulls to stand and will be over the side of the cot as it was a bed height and lowering it makes it harder for the middle of the night settling.

The ultra gentle AP approach worked well with the 5 yo despite his disability as he loves snuggling into bed and is asleep in seconds (it's just his night waking needs sorting!).

I'll text her and get her to look through the ideas. It'll be nice for her to see that there are others who have found a solution. I think we both can't see the wood for the trees.

I've just managed to sit for 5 and read the replies, I've ordered the no cry sleep book, so it should be. Here soon.
I think the main problem with the 8 mo is I'm worried he will roll or crawl off the bed, so I'm keeping an eye on him, plus my non sleeping 5 yo.
If I could get the baby to sleep in the cot all night I could concentrate on the older one, I find if you get to him in time it stops a bit wake up and he only needs resettling and will drop off again, something dh isn't great at.

P.s I'm the daughter if that wasn't clear, sorry if my post makes no sense!