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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Don't Enjoy Talking to my baby?! Worried

12 replies

BouncyBabe98 · 10/12/2013 08:47

Hi,

I am really struggling to keep talking to my baby. I feel guilty about not enjoying talking to him as I am sure it is good for him when I do. I just find it really difficult to keep up the chatter (he is 4 months old). I feel like a bad mum for not enjoying interacting with my baby. I do interact and talk to him at the moment but I just find it a struggle. I do find it easier when I am with other mums though.

Has anyone else had this? I am just wondering if I stop talking to him as much will I damage his development?

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Indith · 10/12/2013 08:53

Talking to a person who doesn't talk back is hard. Don't feel guilty. If you find it easier around other mums then great, I'm sure you get plenty of interaction at groups and so on. Don't worry. You'll probably find it easier as he gets bigger and reacts and interacts in more noticable ways and takes an interest in things, that's when you find yourself pointing out cars and lorries and fire engines while walking down the road :)

Personally I found it a lot more natural with subsequent children as you already have toddler prattle going on .

Original poster

BouncyBabe98 · 10/12/2013 09:15

Thanks Indith. :) Yes I do find it easier at the Mums groups def.

OP posts:

ZuleikaD · 10/12/2013 11:32

You don't have to talk to him, necessarily - all interaction is good but so is the amount of language he hears, so just narrate what you're doing. Imagining yourself being videoed for YouTube can be a useful mental technique - just explain what you're doing, and look at the camera (baby) periodically to make eye contact.

bundaberg · 10/12/2013 11:42

yes i was exactly the same, especially with my first baby. to be honest i just didn't know what to say, and i felt kind of silly doing it! it got easier with subsequent children though

DearlyDepartedMrsFinch · 10/12/2013 11:44

Yes. I agree with bundaberg. It does get easier with more children. Obviously, the more you do it the less self-conscious you are and the easier it gets.

Babies are pretty poor conversationalists, IMO.

Parliamo · 10/12/2013 11:48

I did a lot of singing and nursery rhymes with my first because i couldnt keep up the chatter. Especially when all i wanted to do was sleep! Babies are a bit boring really... It gets easier once they start interacting, don't feel guilty.

cornflakegirl · 10/12/2013 12:53

I found it really hard too. I really hate the whole narrate your day thing, and didn't really do it. We did groups, I went round to see friends who are good with babies, and then all of a sudden they were big enough to enjoy being read to and to respond to nursery rhymes and to try to make sounds themselves and to actually do something that I might conceivably want to comment on, and it all got so much easier.

Babies are really boring. It's a good job they're so cute!

cornflakegirl · 10/12/2013 12:56

Oh, and both of mine have normal language skills in spite of me

IfAtFirstUDontSucceed · 10/12/2013 22:55

I'm naturally a self conscious person and find it a lot more difficult interacting with my baby in front of people than I do alone. I also felt guilty that I wasn't talking to him much.
He's now 8 months old and I've become a lot more confident and relaxed and most of 'our' conversation is me giving running commentary of the day, pretty inane stuff - "mummy will get changed while you play with your toys, then we'll have our lunch and after that well go for a walk.... "Look, the kitty cat is at the door, should we let him in?" I now catch myself chirping away at him in the middle of the supermarket, something id never see myself doing!

CheshireSplat · 10/12/2013 23:25

I used to find it hard to think of things to say, so the tip I had from DH who's done lots of caring for people who can't talk back is to repeat things once or twice. E.g "mummy's just going to get you some milk. i'm just going to get you some milk." It really helped. Unfortunately I do it still out in the real world so seem slightly crazy!

plentyofsoap · 11/12/2013 01:30

I have turned into my gran who gave a wonderful running explaination of what she was doing all the time! Remember to stop it when out shopping alone though.

airhostess · 13/12/2013 22:01

I was the same, but as the weeks go on your confidence builds and they start to do more which gives you more to talk about. I was looking at some videos last week of me talking to my Son when he was tiny and omg I just kept repeating the same sentence! Don't worry my Son is 2.5 now and we both chat constantly, enjoy the peace ;) x

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