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4 yo hits or pushes when doesn't get his own way- help/strategies pls!!

2 replies

mumoftwoboysS · 08/12/2013 22:32

I've got a mostly well behaved boy who is mostly good at school! But there have been a few issues with him hurting other kids when he doesn't get his own way. eg. pushing a kid off a climbing frame because she wouldn't move!

we have a few cases at home where he might hit or push his brother if he doesn't give him a toy he wants. I've always drummed into him that it's not ok to hit or push or hurt someone else and I put him on time out straight away if this happens.

I was just wondering if there are any other strategies I can use? Should I try a reward chart for NOT hitting/hurting kids at school then a reward at the end of the week or try punishment- i.e. taking away priviledges if he's naughty.

i'm not sure, for his age, what would be most effective. I have also told him to use his 'words' and ask to have a toy or to have a go on playground equipment but it doesn't seem to have helped much so far. Maybe I need to give him some exact phrases to try??

any advice/tips welcome. I was so mortified he'd hurt other kids at school and really want this behaviour to stop asap.

OP posts:
Tapiocapearl · 09/12/2013 04:22

Yes give him some exact phases ' please can you move' 'please can I have a turn'

Also have zero tolerance of violence at home. If he hits, there should be no warning. Put him in time out straight away every time.

Tapiocapearl · 09/12/2013 04:25

If he hits when out in the park, remove him from the play equipment and sit him on a bench or stone for 5 mins. If he repeats and hits again, take him home. You need to send a clear message that you won't tolerate it. Don't bang in about it verbally though. Just say 'you hit that boy again so we are going home'

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