2 year old from hell

[kazza1972xx]

I am the mum of 4 girls from 19 to 2 . I have a 16 year old with adhd and odd , a 9 year old with adhd and my 2 year old is the worst yet , im 41 this month and finding her very difficult to cope with my daughter who is 3 in may . From being born she has not slept a full night , hardly has a nap in the day and is constantly demanding to the point I cant think straight . I have spoke to my gp and explained its making me ill shes up at least 3 times sometimes as many as 6 . She never seems to be in a deep sleep . And then because of her interrupted sleep she is then tierd and cries most of the day she still has a dummy and bottle I asked the health visitor for advice on this she said just take it off her after 2 nights thats it shell be fixed !!!! 10 nights later she was still screaming to the point the neighbours complained as she was keeping them up !! Ive dealt with most things having 4 children but this is really hard I have no mum or dad around my partner is working and tries to help but she wont let him .. I cant even go shopping with him now as I get so worked up at the way she behaves we end up coming home ... any advice plz

Does your DD go to nursery/CM? Does she behave like this in these settings/with these people?

If she does go to nursery/CM, I'd arrange for DP to pick her up once a week on a regular basis if at all possible.

I think your DD needs to know that she's not the boss, and she doesn't get to pick and choose which of her parents is allowed to look after her.

For your sanity, at the weekend, or whenever your DP is off work, get out for a few hours and don't go back until the agreed time. This will reinforce the message that DP is just as much a parent as you.

How is your relationship with your neighbors?

I think if you have the type of relationship where you can approach them, then it might be worth doing this, as they would also benefit from you trying to establish good sleep patterns.

If speaking to them about it is feasible, be open and considerate. Eg. If they work nights shifts, try and start sleep training when they start their shifts; if they've got teenage dcs, don't start it when they've got exams.

Also, I wouldn't start the sleep training straight away, I'd get dd used to DP looking after her on his own - then you can both tackle the sleep issue together (you might find it easier if you're having breaks from her in the day).

There are also all the usual rewards and sanctions, but as a mum of 4 you will have done all this countless times before I'm sure.

Good luck, it will get better, just stick to your guns