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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Back chat and rudeness

4 replies

EmmaG1986 · 28/11/2013 15:52

Hi ladies,
I'm wondering whether anyone can offer any advice. Recently, my 7 year old son has been answering back a lot and also, he has been rude towards me and talking to me in a disrespectful voice. We use time-outs, but I feel these aren't as effective anymore.
Is it time to move onto removing privileges?
He is generally a well-behaved boy most of the time.

Thankyou.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Tee2072 · 28/11/2013 15:54

Yes, if your current method doesn't work, change methods.

Original poster

EmmaG1986 · 28/11/2013 16:06

Tee2072-Any ideas of what sort of privileges to remove? I don't want to send my son to bed earlier, as that's when we enjoy one to one time together, after my youngest is in bed.
Thanks.

OP posts:

Tee2072 · 28/11/2013 16:31

Well, what does he enjoy? My son loses TV time or computer time or gets a favourite toy taken away.

Right this second he's on his best behaviour because he wants to go the school Christmas Fair tonight and I've told him to watch himself as he's already been cheeky and one more cheek and we're not going.

Pick something. Give him the rules. Follow through.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 28/11/2013 17:41

It wouldn't surprise me if you said this behaviour is only directed at you and at school his teachers think he's an angel. The changeling! You're not alone OP.

I think it must be a combo of hormones, and the desire to push boundaries with the person he loves most. I'd also throw in peer influence but his classmates' parents are probably in the same boat. Very tiring for you the parent.

I noticed with my DCs sometimes the whole thing would begin with a smart alecky comment and then somehow snowball because in spite of themselves they just didn't know when to stop and couldn't retract it.

I found it hard to ignore behaviour of this kind especially if the younger sibling got dragged in too. The main thing is be consistant.
"You can choose to do this but if you choose to behave (in whatever unacceptable way) then we wont do X as planned/you won't get to have TV and computer time". When they're older, their social life might suffer.

Balance the stressful episodes with telling him you love him, and big up his positive attributes.

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