This is the first time I have ever posted on anything like this but appreciate some advice/insight. Apologies for long waffly post - hope you can make it to the end!!
The background
My daughter has just turned 6 years old. She has always been a bright, very lively,quite rough and tumble child as she has an older sporty 9 year old brother. She is not a girly girl. ( e.g. She has recently started playing rugby and to my shock was as good as if not better than the boys !) She is also very sporty and agile in other areas. Both are quite competitive with each other and they do argue alot - with her doing much of the wind up as he is more easily irritated. She is also very affectionate and caring and we have a close loving relationship. (Not of course without its ups and downs that most usual parents complain of). But at home she is generally cooperative, gets herself washed and dressed (with some supervision) and will get down to homework (begrudgingly sometimes but not always. So in all - fairly normal, slightly loud boisterous kids who sometimes need strong parents to calm them down a bit.
The Problem
Recently over the last week the teacher has started to say that she is causing problems in class on at least 2 occasions; being overly rough with other children (alot of whom are quite rough kids themselves when I have seen them); writing on their work; wriggling around and talking on the carpet (DS is quite fidgety at times so was my son) and now yesterday she didn't say her name when called for yoga class so went to playground instead of class. For that, she has been disciplined for dishonesty. (She wanted to play in the playground as she hates the lying down bit in yoga she said). I have started to discuss some of these issues with her and at first she lied about other children bullying her and pulling faces in class which she then admitted wasn't true. She said basically she just wants to be naughty to see when she would get told off! Testing the boundaries? She says she thinks the teacher is too strict and she wants to do her own thing. She is a very single minded child but also copies alot of behaviour from other children if that makes sense. A bit rebellious but not malicious. Her teacher seemed very angry with her behaviour and despite hearing it for the first time, I felt like I was the one being told off too! I do of course always do my best to support school/teacher.
Since then she has started to wet her bed (after being dry for 6 months) and also has complained of stomach pains now I think about it for the last 3 weeks (had urine tested ok).
The Verdict anyone?
I am at a loss to what is going on. It seems she has turned into a bit of a liar as well and can be a bit underhand. Whats worse is that whilst she seems upset when I tell her off and tell her how important it is to listen in school etc etc she doesn't really seem to care. My son has a real work ethic - and has attained 2 years above himself at end of year 3 and he had the odd off day - I am just worried that if I don't nip this in the bed - it could get worse - or do all children just go through phases where they are unsettled? She clearly cannot stand this particular teacher. At home - I can get her to work really hard and achieve loads - at school she just seems to rebel! I know she is only 6 but its a shame if she starts getting a reputation for being a trouble maker. Has anyone had same experience and worked /didn't work?