5 year old DD wont play with or tolerate sister

[mindosa]

am at my wits end with my DD. She has a almost 3 year old sister and she simply refuses to play with her or even engage with her very much. Previously it wasn't such a big deal as DD2 was too young to play but now she is dying to play with her sister but DD1 wont entertain the idea.

DD1 is sensitive, hates criticism and hates when I pick her up on this (or anything else) She then starts acting out, saying 'I don't care', 'I hate you' and this results in me giving out to her and her going into hysterics. This is behaviour that I just cant tolerate - imagine her at 8.

It could well be jealousy but DD1 gets plenty of attention (possibly too much, maybe that's the issue)

She is 5, started school and is getting on well enough

I feel I am doing something wrong and not handling this the way I should - does anyone have any advice. Thanks

Well I have two DDs aged 9 and 5 and they've only started playing together since DD2 turned 4...and could interact on a more level footing.

DD2 (the 5 year old) is not tolerant of my friends 3 year old DS at all....though he's heartbreakingly keen to play with her, with 3 year olds it's all very one sided isn't it....he relies on her for the entertainment so to speak and 5 year olds are not egalitarian enough to give that much...they still like being entertained themselves don't they?

it's not surprising that your older DD isn't that keen....what about finding things they can do side by side like craft activities? We're making loads of Christmas decorations at the moment...we went on a walk, collected pine cones and acorns and have been making little people using wooden beads for the heads and pipe cleaners for the bodies....the acorn caps are glued on for hats. My girls draw faces on the beads and then cover the legs, hats and bodies in glitter!

Easy and pleasant and they both do it while I help....or you could get some black paper, cut them out some shapes....like bells and things...and then help them glitter them.

ICame they sound like super ideas and I will try that approach.

Thanks for the advice

No worries! Another good one is making "wreaths"....I just cut a circle out of card....like a ring....and then they stick things onto it....pom poms, christmassy stickers....glitter....anything! Then make a bow of red ribbon or crepe paper and stick that on it too!