Girls and Friendships, Help!

[BaconAndAvocado]

DD is in Year 1 and since nursery it seems all,her friendships quickly develop into love/hate relationships thriving on manipulation, pettiness and sometimes nastiness (on both sides)

Is this normal for young girls? And if so, at what age do they start nurturing positive friendships?

I have 2 older DSs so all this is new to me.

Tia.

It's very normal...they're vying for position socially. It doesn't make it any easier to see though! I have a DD in year 5 and one in year 1 like you....and I encourage the smaller DD to remain true to herself...and not to allow herself to be told who to play with. They can nurture positive friendships from right now but often it takes a while...invite different girls round for play-dates...and watch to see which friendships to encourage and which to allow to go their own way.

They change "best friends" so often it's not worth worrying about...as long as she's got someone to play with it's fine.

Inviting a mixture of friends over is a good idea. What seems to happen is that she gets very close to a girl and then they fall out or have lots of grievances!

It's good to know its normal! With my DSs things are a lot more straightforward!

Yes....they change best friends termly! The good thing is that as long as they don't hold any grudges, all it does is build up a selection of friends which revolves and sometimes comes together.

I watch out for any bossy behaviour which can turn into bullying...DD aged 5 has one little mate who has a tendency towards trying to "own" DD and tells her not to play with X or Y and if she does then she won't be friends anymore.

My DD takes this as gospel and Ive had to drill it into her that a good friend doesn't boss like this....and that she can play with who she wants...I primed her to reply "Fine...off you go then! I'm playing with x if you want to join in."

And it seems to have worked so far.

I know what you mean about the bullying jitney

Although I'm sure DD is the perpetrator too sometimes of above-mentioned behaviour.

Also like the idea of them building up a selection of friends.