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Behaviour/development

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Toddler with tremendous anxiety

2 replies

stopgap · 18/11/2013 19:50

I'm trying to figure out whether my son's behaviour is normal or "other".

My son has always been on the sensitive side of things. He was colicky as a baby, had tremendous stranger anxiety, couldn't be put down, breastfed often, needed to be rocked vigorously to sleep etc.

Between one and two he showed improvement in social settings, but things have been a real challenge since he turned two (he's 27 months now). He is newly afraid of masks, costumes, flies, insects, dogs (we have two), all of which I know is normal, but more concerning is his almost abject terror in social situations. This does not apply to all situations. On home turf, he's great. With close family, he is gregarious and outgoing. But any type of toddler music or gym class, or even play dates with kids he's known for 18 months, and he starts screaming and crying as soon as we walk in the room, yelling, "All done, all done, all done."

Today I remained at toddler soft play and rode out the storm. The group consisted of one other mother, two placid toddlers and a lovely teacher. To my eyes, nothing alarming or overpowering whatsoever. Finally, after forty minutes, he stopped crying, got off my knee, and brought me a hoop. Previously I've left as soon as he kicks up a stick, but thought that today I would try a new tactic.

Does this sound like some sort of sensory issue, or merely a toddler working through the usual range of anxieties that hit between two and three?

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Jaffakake · 18/11/2013 20:20

I think that given he went & got a hoop it's just usual toddler stuff, it just takes him a bit to calm down. I'd pick a couple of sessions to ride out the storm in, with people who will be accepting & understanding.

My ds (27 months ) is really outgoing in most situations. Recently at swimming, something we've done for a long time, he started to kick up a fuss. I'm really stubborn & always stick it out. A month or so later he's back to normal.

Stick to your guns!

stopgap · 18/11/2013 21:32

Yes, I do think it's the way.

I was actually fairly similar as a toddler and young child (have vivid memories of talking to no-one the entire first year of reception, and sitting in the corner crying at toddler play school). And I grew out of it. So there has to be hope!

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