3 year old DS turned into a nightmare... Help - Stressed

[CJones1982]

Any advice welcome - My son turned 3 last month I'm at SAHM - he's always been fairly well behaved apart from odd tantrum etc - in the last month he has completely changed and it's got to the point earlier this morning that I thought all I do is tell him off and I'm not enjoying him very much ATM which makes me sad. It seems everything is a battle, getting dressed, not remotely interested or even capable of potty training, doesn't seem to eat properly like he used to, whinges about everything, throws his toys and trashes his bedroom, the list is endless...
My friend visited for a few days and it was like he was jealous of her being here, us talking and I felt so embarrassed by his behaviour. I try to do activities with him but he throws them, going to the park and he just wants me to carry him, take him to toddler group and he hates the noise and won't play with any children. Is this a phase? I've tried not getting cross and distraction etc but it's just as if he's running riot not listening to anything I say. My husband works all day so doesn't seem to see it as such! Please help me...

Hi CJones1982...based on my 31 years of experience with special needs children, your son sounds like he may be exhibiting symptoms of a sensory disorder. Please have your pediatrician do a sound and complete physical and be sure to describe the behavioral changes in your post. I am most concerned about his response to noise, which is typical of a sensory disorder. In the meantime, to reduce the battles, give him limited choices in which clothes he can wear...that is, you pick out 2 outfits suitable for the weather or activity of the day and let him choose from the two. Same with any activities...provide two and let him choose. This gives him a sense of control over his environment, which is what he is responding to....a lack of control. Perhaps his room is too stimulating; remove most of the items that are not totally necessary and leave only a few toys available...again, provide limited choices and each week or so, switch them out and give him new choices. As for his eating changes, it is possible that certain textures may be irritating to him; watch closely what he does eat and again, provide nutritional, limited choices to him.
Check with your local school district to see if they have a service similar to what we have here in Florida...a "Childfind" service that screens preschoolers for special needs services. I hope this helps....