Is this an unreasonable request??

[ninipops]

That an almost 4 yr old who is perfectly able to dress herself actually do so in under an hour without having to threaten to take all her toys, ban her from TV, take her scooter etc etc??? Am I doing something wrong?

You're not bring unreasonable! Where does she get dressed? Are there loads of distractions? Maybe try putting her in somewhere else, like the bathroom, to do it instead?

Thats a good plan. She usually gets dressed in the sitting room as have 2 younger DC's - if she goes to her room she would never come out!

Make it a race, set a timer. Reward being fast rather than punish being slow, it's more pleasant all round. E.g. if you get dressed quickly you can have five minutes of TV, can you get dressed before I've finished doing X, I bet I'll be faster than you.

not unreasonable, but you do know that you will be doing the intermittent threats/banning stuff for years don't you? DS1 is 8 and has fits and starts of being ready for school and not. For years I have been trying to make sure he gets himself organised and ready for school and sometimes he does it and sometimes not. I reckon at least once a term I have to get really cross for him to have a run of good mornings.

Like this morning when I shouted at him and told him he really pissed me off for ignoring my requests that he get his shoes on ready for school and then when we come to leave the house he hasn't got ready and can't find his bloody shoes FFS

Noble - the race thing works getting to nursery but she is stubborn as a mule and if the mood takes her will just dig her heels in and it does take - frequently!

Funny - yes I know the threats will be a lifetime commitment!! Its just typical on the days when we don't need to be anywhere she will pick out her own clothes and come downstairs fully dressed before shes had breakfast but on school days she is dragging on her shoes and screaming at me to wait as I am pushing the buggy with the other 2 out the door!

My mum used to get me up with enough time to get ready for school, and 15 mins "spare" so if I got ready quickly I could watch a bit of tv or a video (or read a chapter of my book when I got a bit older bookworm ) and apparently it almost always worked, so that's my plan for DS when he starts school :)

Rock my DC get up at 6.30 with their dad and we leave the house at 8.30. The 3yo is great and gets ready the first time he is asked, the 8yo is a PITA who thinks he knows best and doesn't need to listen to what I say. It's really not a matter of not having enough time

I've bought a half-hour sandtimer for DD from amazon and I start it when she has to start getting ready - if she's not done in the time then there's a penalty. It helps that she can see the time passing. We also use it at suppertime - they have half an hour to eat their supper or they don't get stories.

Funnys I didn't mean there wasn't enough time, but if I got ready quickly then there was enough time for a 'reward' ie tv time; if I dragged my heels then there wasn't!

ah well we have tonight introduced the 'do what we ask first time or there will be consequences' ie no computer time etc. We will see!

did you see the 3 day nanny show on tv? I have no experience of 4 yr olds but she addressed this issue by getting the girls to trace a lifesize outline of themselves the night before and then dress the outlines in the clothes they wanted to wear the next day. it worked on the show but may be edited of course. ..worth a look

well it worked this morning, so long may it continue