Young niece very affectionate with dp

[InsultingBadger]

My 11yo niece is very affectionate with my dp. She has always loved him dearly since we got together when she was 4 but as she is getting older her affection is becoming a little intense.

She doesn't leave him alone. We had a family party yesterday and she spent the whole time climbing onto his lap, stroking his head, following him to the toilet and waiting outside, cuddling him round his neck and whispering I love you, standing next to him and holding his hand.

Would it be unkind to ask her to respect personal space a little more? Should we ask my sister to have a kind word?

The poor man cannot move without her hanging onto him. She even sat on the floor and held onto his leg when it was time to go.

What would you do!? Do we even need to do anything?

Anyone?

The kid won't get it (she obviously doesn't understand personal space) so I wouldn't talk to her.

Have a word with the parents... Great opportunity for them to teach her another of life's lessons.

Yes I think we will. Dp tries to get her off but she thinks its hilarious

Her parents should have intervened by now and explained that her behaviour is inappropriate. If they don't explain this sort of thing she's going to end up learning some lessons the hard way.

Maybe you asking them to deal with it will remind them of their responsibilities to her as well as to other people.

Yes speak to her parents.

Thanks all.

I will speak to my sister. I am not sure how she will handle it as she is about as subtle as a sledgehammer which is another concern.

My niece doesn't have a dad either so I feel a bit bad as she may be trying to emulate the relationship dd has with dp.

Either way it isn't appropriate so dsis needs to know. I can't believe she doesn't notice it!

Can you approach it from the 11 and approaching puberty needs a different relationship with uncle than when she was a little girl?

Oh bless her - it might be her first crush. I hope her mum is able to explain personal space to her though, your poor husband!

11 Y6 or 11 Y7?
It makes a huge difference, a primary child hanging on to a father figure is quite different to a senior school child, who needs to begin to see the world in a more grown up way.

I think it is a little crush, she seems besotted! She is only just 11 so the young end of the scale. She lives in a very hostile household with little affection and lots of shouting so whilst she needs to understand boundaries I want to make sure I approach it right.

My sister has 4 children, niece is second eldest, she is expected to be very grown up in some ways. My sister is terrible with emotional issues but I don't want to tread on her toes by speaking to niece myself