Is 17 months to early to discipline?

[MummyV18]

My little boy is nearly 17 months and is testing his boundaries. For one example he bangs on the tv so we tell him no and remove him from the tv but he runs back to the tv bangs and starts rocking the tv. So we tell him firmly no and remove him but yet again he runs back does the same and laughs as he thinks its a game. What discipline method would be effective at this age? Or is he still too young for anything more?

Here is some useful info: www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/Discipline

Also, please make sure that your TV and any other furniture is secured to the wall.

Good luck.

Our son (same age) does the same! Will watch this thread with interest.

My son is 18 months and iv just started to 'discipline' him. I can tell when he's doing something "naughty" intentionally because he knows it's "naughty" and when he does something he shouldn't without thought.

When he's being intentional I tell him In a really calm and still nice voice not to hit the tv for example, and I give him an explanation as to why not. He then gets the look in his eye lol and if does it again, I say really firmly "mummy said do not hit the tv, if you do it again I'll put you outside" (outside is in the hall outside the front room - basically just on the otherside of the baby gate where he's perfectly safe & in view). If he does it after that I pick him up put him in the naughty spot for 30 seconds and then ask him if he wants to come in. I then open the baby gate say you must not hit the tv back in my normal voice, then ask for a big cuddle.
To be honest iv only dome it a few time, being 'outside' breaks his heart so much now when I say I'll put you outside he doesn't do it again, to which I then tell him he's a good boy and we move on. So far it's really working.

I wasn't sure if he was too young, but he has a fantastic understanding and definitely understood the process. Not worth doing if your toddler has no idea why he/she's on the naughty step/spot etc.

I think it's way too young.

distract him.

when he does it. don't say "no taht's naughty" or "ah ah" or anything negative. keep a nice pleasant voice and call him over to see a book or toy that he will get engrossed in. have a stash of 'distraction' items that he doesn't have free access to so that they are interesting for him and he will want to investigate.

We started very gentle discipline as soon as my DD was mobile, in that if she was messing with something dangerous (a hot radiator, wires) we'd say, 'no, that's dangerous' or 'no, too hot' - we'd then move her gently away and distract with something fun. Then as she got older, we extended that so that she if she snatched or hit we'd say, 'no, that's not kind' and gently move away and distract. We try to limit saying no to things which are dangerous and will hurt her or others and it seems to have given her quite a clear sense of boundaries (so far anyway!!)

"way too young"?!!! - OF COURSE IT'S NOT!

Yes, as 'notadoctor' says, as soon as they are mobile and can understand things, don't let them get away with dangerous or 'naughty' things.

Toddlers are curious, and every moment of the day can be a learning experience for them, but adults have to guide them towards suitable activities. If they bang the TV it's because they are BORED and you aren't paying them any attention. Switch the TV off, get down on the floor, and PLAY with them!

I worked in primary schools for over twenty years, and teachers have to battle with the consequence of children who were not disciplined or taught to listen to stories when they were little.

DO NOT have the radio or TV on all day; share suitable programmes with children, and talk about them; and DO NOT spend all day on you phone or computer, neglecting the child.

"If they bang the TV it's because they are BORED and you aren't paying them any attention. Switch the TV off, get down on the floor, and PLAY with them!"

Um, that's not discipline.

If you were about disciplining a baby/toddler then you wouldn't reward them for their "bad" TV banging behaviour.

I say no to my 16 month old - she clearly understands what she's done wrong (I know because she'll look at me, giggle to herself, and then do it again!) I just move her away , say 'NO' in a firm voice, and sit her on her bottom. Then I walk away for a minute til she's calmed down. Then I come back and give her a big cuddle and a kiss and tell her how good she is for staying away from whatever I'm trying to get her away from. That seems to work so far xxx

JYP - but if they didn't have to compete with the TV, they wouldn't be going up to it and banging it! I agree the child can't monopolize every moment of a parent's life, but gradually has to learn how to amuse themselves while parents are busy.

At school teachers and TAs will try to 'anticipate' what a child might get up to that is 'naughty', and reduce the temptation if possible, so the inappropriate behaviour doesn't occur. Similarly, parents can remove things or alter their behaviour that might lead to a child being 'naughty.

Because, of course, it ISN'T naughty to the child, it's just part of learning and play. Adults have learnt over many years how to behave, where boundaries are, etc. The toddler is only just at the start of that learning process, but the parent can make that journey smoother for everyone, by reducing potential obstacles, both physical and emotional.

Try to concentrate more on what it's good to do.

eg instead of 'don't drop the crayons on the floor! That's naughty' say 'It's good to keep the crayons on the table'.

Surely he's just trying to communicate that he wants the telly on, or a particular programme on. so you can say that the programme isn't on now. or the tv can go on after lunch. just now it would be good to play lego.

We tend to try distraction first, so with DS it's usually asking where one of his toys is/handing him the toy, if that doesn't work then we do what you do. Just remove him. And if that doesn't work then after a couple of attempts we'll put him outside the room and shut the door for a few seconds.

This usually results in a massive temper tantrum, but by then he has at least forgotten whatever it is he was doing to start it all off.

We try to explain every step as we go do it, no idea how much it's making a difference, but still.

Otherwise, try not to react too much to the naughty stuff (he's usually doing it for the reaction) and really overreact when he does something good.

Thanks for the replies guys. I'm having real trouble but will try some other things.

It seems to be with lots of things, the tv can be on or off and he still does it, he throws food, if I try to get him to do something he throws a tantrum until he gets it.

I'm actually quite upset and don't know what to do. I have no friends with kids and feel completely lost.

I don't want him to become a child that just gets his own way but maybe the tantrums are normal. I took him to a tumble tots class today and he wouldn't do half the things we were supposed to be doing all he wanted to do was go on this soft block like a slide (he loves slides) he wouldn't listen to me and just arched and cried when it died to bring him back to the class.

Sorry to ramble I just feel really lost today.

We used 'AH AH AH! from a very early age - It was good enough for that dog trainer with the bun on 'it's me or the dog!'

Sorry to hear you're finding it tough. It sounds like your DS is spirited and independent which you should be proud of - even if it's tiring at times! My DD often doesn't join in at organised activities either - she very much knows her own mind!

I read the Happiest Toddler on the Block and found it had some really useful tools and techniques for stopping tantrums or at least ending them early.