When I first met my step son he was 4yo and he bit me on the bum my oh said hes just excited. Having kids of my own I should of realised this was not right but I really liked this guy so I put it out of my mind. It wasnt long before he started turning up at my house asking me to baby sit this became a bit too regular for a new couple. I found his son very hyper active and un disciplined but I reasoned he had been brought up different to my own children so things were bound to feel strange. After a year of this we moved in together and it wasnt until then I found out he had been still seeing his ex and that was why I had been babysitting his son. I was obviously very hurt and at the time was going through an ectopic pregnancy so feeling I needed him plus the upheavel I had just done moving my kids home + school I thought it best to forgive him. But this changed things I saw him differently and unfortunately his son too. I started to resent being left with him as I would think my oh was cheating again. 3 years later and we have had a dd together and he has realised what he did wrong and moved on the problem is I havnt and he doesnt see he may need to reasure me at times. He says im paranoid but I have never been like this in previous relationships and I was married for 9 years to my boys father. Also he doesnt support me with his son whos behaviour has got increasingly worse over the years he is now 7 and he hits, bites and kickes by children. He is horrible towards me, he laughs in my face when I tell him off. He also hurts my dd he drags her around pinches her and has also bit her. My oh says hes just a child and sticks up for him which makes his son laugh at me more. I think he may have adhd but my oh says I say this because he isnt mine but he is 2 years behind in his school work he is 7 yo and cant say the alphabet, spell his name, read or count past 20 . Im getting to where I cant cope with him anymore and wish his mum would just come back for him but she walked out when he was 2 because she couldnt cope with his behaviour either. I dont take my kids out anymore because my stepson will play up and ruin it my oh wont have him whilst I take my kids out because he says I cant leave him out. He wants me to take just his son out though he says I should love him more than my own kids because his mum isnt around. We argue about this all the time now we cant even be in the same room my oh is always right and threatens to leave and take our dd If I challenge him so I have to back down I have panic attacks and self harm my life is a mess. My kids dont like them and want them to leave. He says he will never accept my children but I have to love his seriously what can I do??? Please help :(