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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Sitting at the table

7 replies

DrCoconut · 27/10/2013 18:08

How long do you think a 2.5 year old should be able to sit at the table for? We went for a meal today (special occasion) and had to wait an hour before our food was served. After a good start of 20mins or so DS was fractious and didn't really eat well by the time it came. He wanted to get down and play outside! I feel quite judged because I have a child with ants in his pants.

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gintastic · 27/10/2013 18:28

20 minutes sounds pretty good to me! My kids (5 and 3) would probably manage this but not a huge amount longer.

nextphase · 27/10/2013 18:36

Well, DS2 is 2.5.
If I had 101 jigsaws (his latest obsession) in my handbag, he'd sit there for the full hour.
But, just sit at a table, while the grown-ups chat, having been promised food, I'd say 20 mins was pretty good.

DoudousDoor · 27/10/2013 18:46

At nearly 2 DS' limit was 45 mins IF he was eating.

We recently went away with family and ate out every meal. Someone would 'exercise' DS and we only expected him to sit at the table to eat. And when he'd finished he either had toys or wandered off again (accompanied).

Didnt feel judged once

Original poster

DrCoconut · 27/10/2013 19:00

The problem was there was no food. Our attempts to entertain him at the table failed after a time and he got really grumpy and hungry. DH took him for a run round. We didn't want to over snack him earlier or he wouldn't have eaten lunch. Then after he had eaten only half his food I had to take him out again. Sensed a few cats bum faces that he wasn't sitting nicely until everyone had finished. My parents think he should be made to and I'm guessing others agree. I was it seems an abnormally placid child. I think the wait just threw him completely and he had a bit of a meltdown. We don't take him out to eat regularly and he gets down once he's done at home so no real measure of "behaviour" to go on. Meals out with toddlers=stress!

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nextphase · 27/10/2013 19:30

I think you've got it nailed in your second post, and the older generations have miss remembered what an hour feels like when you have kids that small.
FWIW, I'd always over snack (mine had a fried egg sarnie as a snack yesterday) than risk over hungry kids. Many will shout me down on that one.
Sounds like you did the best you could. Ignore the others.

Jakeyblueblue · 27/10/2013 23:22

My ds is 2.4 and I would be thrilled if he sat in a restaurant for 20 mins. He has constantly got ants in his pants and is not food orientated in the slightest so a bad combo if you fancy a meal out.

neolara · 27/10/2013 23:27

I think 20 mins is pretty good. The oldies have just forgotten what it's like. Ignore them. Some kids will sit for ages, some won't. My view with things like "sitting at table" is that you have got to play the long game. By say 6 or 7 you want then to be able to sit nicely, have reasonable table manners and stay seated until everyone has finished. But pushing them to do something that that they are not developmentally ready for (e.g. staying in their seat for an hour at aged 2) is completely bonkers and unless you have a very compliant child, will just end up in years and years of stressful suppers.

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