baby can't push up - should I worry?

[NudeRevengeWiggle]

My baby is 4.5 months and can't push up on her arms at all. When she is on her stomach she lifts her head but doesn't put any weight on her arms, just claws at the mat and spreads her arms around. She's strong in other ways, has been sitting very well with support for about a month and can sit for a second or two without support now, rolls from side to side, holds her head steady.

We didn't do stomach time for a long time because she had awful awful reflux and would choke every time, so I stopped until recently, have I failed her?

Her reflux is OK now and she can stay on her stomach for a few mins so if I keep at it will she catch up or is there a problem?

I feel like a shit mother!

Firstly you are not a terrible mother! Reflux is v distressing for littlies, please don't panic.

What is your de like if she's on her tummy when resting on you? On your shoulder for example? Can she prop herself with her elbows flexed?

Dd not de!

Nope, she sounds fine to me, there's quite a range at that age (at all ages), and the important thing is the head control IMO. Not a health professional though so I am sure somebody else will have an opinion. Development can go in massive fits and starts, so she could be drawling in a month despite seeming so far off now.

She will prop herself up on my chest if I'm at an angle but laid flat she just claws like she does on the mat. I think she has some strength in her arms but doesn't know what to do with them.

I wouldn't worry too much - sounds like she just needs to figure out what to do rather than not having the physical ability. You could try rolling up a small blanket and putting it under her chest just below her armpits when she's on her front - it would give her a bit of elevation to work with.

Ok propping on you even at an angle is good. Some babies just really dislike being on their tummy and struggle to maintain it for even short periods of time - I'm sure lots of posters will agree!

Even if she spends little bits of time lying on you it still counts as being on her tummy. Id also try popping a rolled up towel or blanket under her chest to help support her and make it a bit easier. Head control and propping through arms is what I would expect at this age. Little and often throughout the day and once she's really mastered this gently reduce the angle you're sat at to make it a little bit harder.

If you are still worried I would ask your hv to review her for reassurance.

OK I will try propping her on a rolled up blanket and see if she finds it any easier. I put her on her stomach for about a minute or two 3 or 4 times a day, is that enough? She will stay on our chests for longer so will do that more often as well.

DS had bad reflux and the same problem for a while - sometimes the issue is that their backs are so strong from the reflux arching that they don't NEED to push up to keep their heads up, so they seem a bit slower. DS is now 7 months and absolutely in line with where you'd expect with his strength and arms.

You might want to try more tummy time though - most of the guides we saw said at least 30 minutes a day, some more. There are some really good tips on slowly getting used to tummy time on Mama OT

My ds is the same at 4 months. He's ridiculously strong on the upper body but when he rolls over he can't seem to master pushing up on his arms. He can hold his head Ip but the arms stay at his sideWe've also avoided tummy time as it always turned into lake of spew time. He'll do it when he's ready, all babies are different. Relax!!!

I tried the blanket and she had a good go at it but she realised she could roll onto her back! So it's been a struggle today to get her to stay on her tummy. I think she will get there in the end.

By DD is exactly the same. 4.5 months old and can't (won't?) push up on her arms. I avoided tummy time in the early months because she hated it. I'm trying to do 20-30 mins acday now, but rarely do more than 5-10 mins at a time as she just starts squawking:-/

I wouldnt worry about it too much, our dd was like that but as the weeks/months went by she got to grips with it. she didn't really want to crawl and wanted to be on her feet more but I think she didn't want to crawl because she knew she didn't have strength in her arms to carry her.

Sounds fine to me. Don't think DD ever pushed up! She also had bad reflux and hated being on her stomach, so frankly, I just didn't push it. Did buy her one of those tummy time mats though, where you put them on a movable platform. She was quite happy on there!