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Tantrums and a 4yr old

8 replies

flibbertywidget · 07/10/2013 13:37

Hi - I haven't posted on here in a long while. My son started school in Sept, he was just 4 at the end of August. His behaviour in the past week has been atrocious, hitting me, answering back, screaming in my face. He then apologises and says he loves me and he is clearly upset at his rage. He has always been a little like this and prone to having a tantrum, normal for toddlers. He loves cuddles and when I asked him why he was behaving like this, he tells me he doesn't know, but just feels it bubbling in him. We take away his rights to TV, or his toys, but he doesn't care! - Any one got some good coping/management strategies?

If I am honest, I don' t think I help. I am hot headed like him and need to take myself away So I don't blow up also.

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ThisIsBULLSHIT · 07/10/2013 14:16

He is sooo young! My dd has just started school too but she is five in a couple of weeks and she is finding it hard going. My dd is so tired out her behaviour is really dreadful too, pretty much everything your DS is doing! Screaming, stomping, throwing, hitting us etc.

I just calmly put her to bed and leave her to calm down then go in and talk about her behaviour. I reckon it's just extreme tiredness. I am putting dd to bed almost an hour earlier now! I miss her but she needs it!!

Dunno if that helps at all but you are not alone!!!

loveisagirlnameddaisy · 07/10/2013 14:24

If he's always been a bit like this, then it's clearly part of his character. I would also say tiredness plays a major part. My DD is turning 4 next week and although she's not at school, she is now at nursery 5 days a week, plus she has a lot of afternoon activity going on and her brother wakes us all up before dawn every day so she's generally grouchy and tired at the end of the day.

I agree that earlier bedtime helps and if he goes into a tantrum just don't interact. Presumably you're responding to whatever he's doing, trying to calm him down. I find this just winds DD up even more. As soon as she starts, I calmly explain I'm going to ignore her if she continues, and if she does, I do. If that winds her up, I put her in a room on her own and explain she needs to calm down. It usually works.

loveisagirlnameddaisy · 07/10/2013 14:25

I've also been told by various people that they spend so much time on their best behaviour for teachers that they have to let it all out when they get home. I often pick up DD from nursery and she's all sweetness and light, then we get home and bam, she turns into the devil child!

flibbertywidget · 07/10/2013 22:24

thanks all. Yes, I think tiredness is a big part of it. Loveisagirlnameddaisy. I thnk you are right about him being on his best behaviour. :-). he was trying to hard tonight. I spoke to some of his friend's mums and they are having the same issue. So not feeling totally alone. DD1, was just emotional and badly behaved, but not aggressive. Guess, this too shall pass :-)

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flibbertywidget · 07/10/2013 22:25

So hard!

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flibbertywidget · 07/10/2013 22:25

not too hard, bloomin' phone!

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smurfette15 · 08/10/2013 21:06

Thank goodness I'm not the only one! My DS has been exactly the same.....tantrums, screaming and shouting at me, throwing things in rage etc Sad. I was quite shocked at the ferocity of some of his outbursts. Hopefully it'll all pass soon then......Hmm

kingbeat23 · 08/10/2013 21:48

I've just posted a massive post on EXACTLY the same thing. Phew. We are not alone! Wink

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