Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

Original poster

How to encourage speech in toddler

20 replies

ChickenLickenSticken · 07/10/2013 09:41

My DD (21mo) seems to be a tiny bit behind her peers in terms of speech. She says a few things like mummy, daddy, ball, up, down, cat, car, tedding, baby, out, door,shoes, etc etc. Plus she make sounds of things (ie I love you is I uf oo).

I'm not massively bothered that she's "behind", but she is getting very frustrated very easily and I think it's due to not being able to express herself when she wants to. So I'd like to help her more.

I repeat things she's holding, or that we pass to her or things she points at, and I ask her to ask nicely for things instead of grunting/whining and pointing, or dragging me over to things she wants to do, but I'm really keen to give her a little more useful support as she seems on the cusp but not quite there.

OP posts:

Nigglenaggle · 07/10/2013 12:24

I don't think she sounds that far behind. I think theres alot of exaggeration about how quickly peoples kids do things, partly intentional and part unintentional, because there's a tendency to imagine they are better at things than they are.
She will come on in her own time, but lots of stories are the best thing in terms of helping them develop speech and other literacy skills. Also it might be a bit late, but have you considered baby signing. Our son only has a couple of signs, but they are massively helpful in reducing frustration. As long as you talk at the same time as using the sign, they don't slow them down with speech development.

MyBigShoutingDay · 07/10/2013 12:49

I agree, some signing might be useful to help reduce her frustration in the short time. Just bridging the gap before she's able to use more spoken language.

Telling her to ask nicely for things might actually increase her frustration.

It's better to continue with the other strategies you're using and put clear and repetitive language onto her non-verbal requests (the pointing, dragging and vocalisations). E.g. "biscuit, DD wants a biscuit"

Also, don't worry about how clear her words are at this stage :)

eatyourveg · 07/10/2013 12:54

Would definitely second singing

showtunesgirl · 07/10/2013 12:56

OP, are you sure that she's behind? She sounds fine to me!

TheLadyVie · 07/10/2013 12:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Minnieisthedevilmouse · 07/10/2013 13:01

Doesn't sound behind to me. Give her space. Maybe every adult repeating her or jumping in quick makes her think 'why bother?'

showtunesgirl · 07/10/2013 13:07

Can I also just ask how physical your DD is? My childminder said that before they are two they tend to be either a walky or talky baby.

Mine is 23 months this week and has only just started taking steps but she talks for England. Her brain is definitely geared towards talking but not so much the physical side just yet.

Also your DD may well be saying many words than you think she is. Try taking a count of the words she says over a couple of days and you might be surprised as to how many words she actually says.

Original poster

ChickenLickenSticken · 07/10/2013 21:40

She didn't walk til 15 months and again that was slightly later than all her little friends. We read lots and she loves books, does the actions at the right bits, she sings twinkle twinkle over and over and over, and I know has understood instructions for a long long time. So I know she's fully in the normal range, I just wondered if there are games or activities that are particularly helpful.

We did signing when she was 6-12 months then I went back to work and couldn't make the class and didn't keep up with the signs at home.

I've seen 6 of her friends recently who are all 1-2.5 months younger than her and all say more words unprompted and more clearly. The parents weren't boasting, I just noticed it.

I'm just feeling super guilty about working at the mo as well as struggling to keep up with everything else so wanted to know if I might be doing something wrong. 4 of the 6 kids I mention have a stay at home parent looking after them so of course the working mummy guilt sensor has pricked up.

OP posts:

Livened · 07/10/2013 22:00

It's not because you're at work. I'm a full time mum and my 20month old only says a handful of words. If you read all the advice given to encourage speech, we literally could have written it! He understands EVERYTHING though. Points mainly and I was a late talker. If he's not upped his speech by around 2 then I might be bothered, but he very physical and I agree with the walker/talker comment above.

Good luck x

willowstar · 07/10/2013 22:08

My 20 month old says very few words that other people would recognise though quite a few that we know...stark contrast to his older sister who was having little conversations by this age. I am not worried at all, he is a completely different character altogether. I wouldn't worry if I were you.

Lurkymclurker · 07/10/2013 22:13

A friend has been working with a speech therapist for her 4.3 year old and kindly let me read the advice leaflets - a quick overview :)

Listen - really concentrate on what they are saying before you correct
Encourage speech in the words they know already e.g. If they know juice and request by pointing/grunting/grabbing encourage them to say the word before they are given the juice
For every think you/they point out say 5 things about it e.g.

dd says "car"
You respond with "yes it's a lovely car"
"Did you see it was a red car"
"That red car went fast"
"Dd where did the car go?"
"It's gone now, bye bye car"

Obviously it's a bit extreme for little ones but it keeps you and the little one entertained and is useful to remember as they grow up as you can differentiate it.

I know there are speech development websites as well which are designed to help parents assist their children.

lemontwist · 07/10/2013 22:13

She says much more than my neary two year old. I know its hard but she will getthere in her own time. Just keep on doing what you are, talking and reading to her. My DS1 is now 3.5 but at age 2 had virtually no distinct language at all but by 2.5 spoke pretty cohently. Now at 3.5 his language astounds me at times!

Jaffakake · 07/10/2013 22:14

your little one doesn't sound behind to me either. Someone told me at some point it's like a tap has been turned on & it just pours out of them. That's how it's been with my little boy. He could understand pretty much every direction I gave way before he could use those words.

At this age though, I don't think talking necessarily helps with frustration though. Mine can say 'stuck' which I think helps when he wants to move something, but he's only just got 'help' at 24 months. When they're tired, really annoyed, angry or really hurt no words & crying is their default as they don't have the emotional capacity to express themselves!

lemontwist · 07/10/2013 22:14

Oops, so many typos!

Deliaskis · 07/10/2013 22:17

Honestly, my DD was exactly the same at that age and now at 2.7 I can't shut her up and she told me a lovely story tonight when she was in bed, which involved queens and kings, and dinosaurs and sitting on thrones and trees and beanstalks and eating cake and going to the park. I just could not have imagined it 6 months ago.

I think she was honestly listening and storing it up but not re-producing language for ages. She was also ver physical so not focussed on speaking for a while.

It all started when she was around 2 I guess.

I did see a friend who is a speech therapist who had no real concerns about her, but did give me a book called baby talk, and there are some interesting things in there:

Don't force speech, don't try and make her say something before letting her have/do something
Don't ask her too many questions that you already know the answer to just to try and get her to speak, as in 'what does a cow say?', because most kids don't see the point in answering
Don't correct her
As a poster upthread mentioned, 'narrate' the things she just moans for a bit 'as in DD wants a biscuit, OK let's go and get the biscuit tin'
Basically just model normal adult speech, with normal intonation etc.
Sing lots of songs, including with actions
Read lots of books
Follow her play, and talk about it as you're going
Agree also with writing down words that she's saying, it's probably more than you think. At this age an attempt counts as a word, so 'bic' for biscuit for example is fine.

She'll suddenly start talking all of a sudden and in a few months she'll also be telling you her bedtime stories.

Also try not to let the guilt take over. I think I gave DD less 'credit' than she deserved (i.e. she was nowhere near as behind as I thought she was), as I was wallowing in the guilt a bit.

RhinestoneCowgirl · 07/10/2013 22:19

Your DD's speech sounds to me like it's within the normal range for her age (and 15 months isn't that late walking either, both mine were around this age or later).

Just keep talking and reading and singing with her when you're with DD and it will all start to fall into place.

And it's not because you're at work.

hazeyjane · 07/10/2013 22:19

15 months isn't late to walk, and it really doesn't sound as though she is behind with her speech.

If she was behind in any way at all, then you working would have nothing to do with it, honestly.

Nigglenaggle · 08/10/2013 12:01

I struggle with the later milestones a bit as well - I mean rolling over is a definite - either they can do it or not, you can pinpoint the exact day they learnt it. But when do you call 'my child can walk'? Is it when they fall over and manage to stick a leg out to stop themselves? Is it when they do one single step? When they can walk across the room? Everyone probably has their own definition of when they say 'Oh yes, he/she is walking now'

Deliaskis · 08/10/2013 13:18

Another thing I forgot to mention is to keep sentences simple with just one 'idea' in each. I am a bit of a blabber mouth and have to consciouly stop myself from saying incredibly confusings things to DD like:

"Have you finished your breakfast DD? Because you can have a yoghurt if you like or if you don't want anything else we can get our shoes on ready to go to Nanna's".

Doh! For a two year old that is just bewildering, so I do now try and keep it simple, if I'm asking a question, don't ask more than one question at once, as they don't know what they should respond to, and if you're just making statements, try and make each sentence express one idea only.

Misty9 · 10/10/2013 21:19

I wouldn't worry about encouraging it - if you talk to her and read to her that's enough. Ds had about 20 words at 21mo. He's now 2.1 and speaks in sentences and describes his day :) it just exploded about 6wks ago. Oh,and he walked at 15.5mo so didn't do either thing early! I didn't talk until 2yo and there is some research suggesting it can be heriditary.

Flip