How to stop a child copying another and getting too excited during a play date when that influence is there

[bumbly]

My son looks up to an older boy..a hyperactive boy

Copies his bad behaviour esp during play dates and now hubby says he is not our son with his own character but the boy he is copying..hubby and I hate it!

Boy comes to play dates as am friends with his mum....my son turns into a hyperactive copying demon. The boy he copies is hyperactive..my son isn't..but is now turning into one!

Will stop play date but how to control this copying behaviour from now on as cant ignore being friends with his mum?

lol ... how old are the children? I suspect that the OP son's is turning from cute baby into super active toddler. Its nothing to do with the other boy's behaviour, its just a phase children of both sexes go through called the terrible twos!

Ha! Ha! most small boys are hyperactive demons when they have company of a similar age. They aren't copying, its innate.

I suggest you take the boys somewhere where its fine to run about and jump like the park or a soft play area.

Bumbly...I had exactly the same situation! Ds is 2, the friend's son was 3 and hyperactive... Nice but uncontrolled. I found trying to meet in parks or have them play in our garden made my life easier. It was awkward cos out at stay n play the other boy would cause havoc thence would copy,but I have a baby too so struggled to keep on top of it. It's difficult telling your child not to do something when the other child's mum let's it go?

Anyway not much advice,but I know exactly how you feel! This friend moved and part of me was relieved...awful huh!

Thence? That should say then DS!

Forgot to add...unfort little one is 6 and you he copies is 8. Yes should know better...everyone shocked today..he s the sensible he but when the other you is there it all falls to pieces..guess answered my own question..limit play dates..but the are I portent to a child and can't keep him without friends.

Hate spell check!

Play dates are quite hyper anyway. Both of mine get a bit doolally - they're excited to see their friends and they're cooped up usually in a room with loads of toys. Indoor playdates are like soft play IMO - hell.

I'd avoid the friend for a while or go out with her just the two of you.

At 6 you should be able to discuss this with him before you meet up and you should be able to put a stop to it at home if he is behaving badly.

My friends ds has ASD and is very excitable and can easily lead ds (7) astray. Her ds can't help it but I don't tolerate that behaviour from my ds.
We meet up once or twice a week and I don't want to stop as she and her ds would be quite isolated otherwise. Before we go out I remind ds that x gets very excited and that we remain calm and if ds behaves badly we will go home. If I see him getting wound up I call him over to sit down and remind him of the consequences. If he starts any nonsense at home I send him to his room telling him to come back when he can behave.

All through his life he will meet people who behave differently and live with different expectations of their behaviour and you can't always limit contact. Better to teach him what your expectations are what behaviour is acceptable to you.

Thanks for lovely worded advice!