Six year-old terrified of dogs - what can we do?

[Dad2TwoMonsters]

Hello

Our 6 year-old DS has become so scared of dogs that he will scream & panic whenever he sees any kind of dog. It doesn't seem to matter on the size, or whether the dog is on a lead or not. Just a few days ago, I was walking him to his school transport when he saw two medium-sized dogs walking on leads down the footpath towards us - he screamed/panicked & ran into the road.

It's a problem that seems to be getting worse, and it's got to the point that I can't really take him out anymore (park etc) because there's likely to be dogs there.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you resolve it?

Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks.

Our DD was like this, she is fine now. We found familiarity really helped, although it kind of seems cruel at the time. Do you or he have any friends with dogs that you can spend a bit of time with inside? I think being scared of dogs in parks is totally understandable (and pretty sensible in some cases) but if they see you being comfortable with dogs in manageable spaces, they do get used to it. The flipside of that is that in my view talking it through on its own does absolutely nothing, it has to be an experiential thing.

To give you some hope, if you'd been asking a year ago, I'd have been straight in with "OMG ME TOO!", DD wants a bloody puppy now...

Did something happen to cause this?

Given his reaction is quite extreme, I'd start with introducing a soft toy dog of a more predictable, friendly breed like a Labrador/Retriever or you could try one of those 'magic' leads pretending there is an invisible dog (iykwim). Cartoons with friendly dogs would also help. Generally try to introduce a bit of dog-ness into his life in a completely unthreatening way where he still feels safe and in control.

When (hopefully) he is talking and acting with these things in a comfortable and positive way, see if there is someone near who has an older (therefore more quiet) female Labrador/Retriever who has ideally had puppies but is now past that age. Bitches who have had puppies tend to be much more tolerant and calmer (mothers are dazed by less once they've had to deal with children!) See if he'd be willing to visit and slowly introduce him. The first visit might be from a distance.

Guide dogs in training are also great for this. Your local rspca may be able to help find some one or see if there is a Kennel Club registered breeder for that type of dog nearby. They often have or know of older breeding dogs now retired.

Hope that helps. Good luck. It's definitely worth helping your ds get over his fear as it is one of those things that becomes self-fulfilling.

My DS's best friend (Y) is terrified of dogs and we have a very, very large dog. Play at our house has got better as time has gone by, just through experience I'd say. We've gone from Y not being able to be in the house with the dog (dog had to be locked out in garden) to being able to be in the same room and occasionally walking past him quite close with no upset.

He's learnt over time that our dog's just not very interested in him and won't approach him. I think that for Y it was a fear of not being able to control the animal and it might jump up at him or hurt him. Now he knows that lots of dogs don't really care about doing that he's much better.

So exposure to a calm, not bothered about kids sort of dog would be great. Lots of people will recommend breeds but imo it's just the individual temperament that is important. I know some bonkers labs and some so chilled they can barely move staffies and rotties. We currently have a very unbothered relaxed greyhound but we've also had jumpy ones. Or a more elderly relaxed dog might be good.

Guide dog training or a good local rescue who really, really know their dogs might help.

DD was like this. At one point it was so bad she threw up at the sight of a dog. We did everything BashfulBunny said and it did improve slightly. Lots of positive reinforcement and steer clear of uncontrolled dog contact where you can. One bouncy, over-enthusiastic dog can set you back months.

You may not want to hear his but DD's phobia was resolved by us getting a puppy. She was keen on the idea mind so it may not work for everyone. Pretty much instantly she was fine with all dogs. You'd never know now.

After being bitten on the foot by a relatives dog when I was 4 I was terrified of dogs. Dad fixed it when I was 5 by bringing home an 18 month old collie a friend needed to rehome. I remember hiding behind the door screaming because this dog was in our house.

Within 2 days it was my best friend until he sadly passed away 15 years later.

Don't suggest you take the extreme step my dad did, but being around dogs is really the only way to fix it.

I was phobic of dogs as a kid, made trips to beach hell! I love them now have my own dog and everything. Start by watching positive dog programs on tv. Read positive dog stories. Next visiting very gentle friendly adult dog, then puppies! I think you will find dog lovers to help you because there are a lot of them around who want to share that doggy love. If you don't have suitable friends there are quite a few organisations who may help maybe in return for a small donation.

DD was incredibly scared of dogs and cats (a cat got in her pram when she was a baby). She is still pretty nervous but we have tried to gently introduce her to dogs. I've talked to her about how to behave around dogs etc and she is a lot better.

One thing we did was to sponsor a guide dog so she gets updates and pictures of 'her' dog. She loves it and is really proud of her dog!