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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Frantic squirming when changing clothes or nappy.

14 replies

jasper · 09/02/2002 09:38

This refers to my 14 month old daughter and not to me.
I realise it is not a serious problem nor is there likely to be a solution, but my baby daughter is a happy little tot most of the time, except when it comes to cahnging her clothes or her nappy. She becomes a hysterical wriggling screetching banshee. It is a good job we have no neighbours as it is the screaming you would expect if a murder was taling place.
She has been like this from an early age. You know those changing table thingies some people have? Ha! She would fracture her skull in an instant throwing herself off one of those.
Since about 8 months she has been really strong, and can flip herself over and shoot off ( screaming) in a fraction of a second. We have never knowingly hurt her during changing, always try to babble away in a happy tone, tried distracting her with toys/food/drink but nothing works.
In my current heavily pregnant state I can no longer physically change or dress her.
She really has to be seen to be believed. My mother, a midwife and mum of four, granny to many says she has never seen anyhting quite like it! But guess what? If my mother or sister changes her she is hardly wriggly at all and does not scream! And she is not quite so bad with dh as she is with me!
Have any of you experienced similar and can you give an explanation for my wee angel's peculiar habit?

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MandyD · 09/02/2002 10:17

I would guess this is a form of power game for her! If she's fine with others changing her that's a classic - according to my son's child psychologist kids always reserve their worst behaviour for the 'primary care giver' - usually the mother!

My son did this wriggling & fighting for a while around the same age, still does at nearly 3 but not so bad. What worked for me was as soon as I got him on his back to change his nappy I would give him a book or a toy he hadn't seen for a while. This would distract him for long enough to get the job done.

Also instead of the "trying to get a reluctant octupus into a net bag" scenario when putting clothes on, would she be better if you stood her in front of the chest of drawers or whatever, got her to help choose what to wear and then dressed her standing up? It might be hard for you at the moment given your difficulties bending down with a bump tho'?

MandyD · 09/02/2002 10:19

Just had a thought - have you tried the Pamper Easy Up's - they can also be put on while child is standing! A bit expensive perhaps but may be worth it.

SueW · 09/02/2002 11:24

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at OP's request.

charliesmummy · 09/02/2002 18:27

Jasper, my ds does much the same, and apart from a really dirty nappy the rest are done standing up or rather bent over his soft chair in the bedroom with him facing away from me. I would tend to agree with mandyd in that it is a power game - and as you may have seen in other threads I get this to the extreme in food, and only from the primary carer! ME!

Eulalia · 09/02/2002 21:07

My son is much the same - he arches his back, 'dances' by sliding his hips from side to side and kicks or sometimes all three! I sit on his lower legs/feet to change him. I try to get the nappy in position under him (not easy when he does the sliding thing as it slips) then I kneel down and tuck his legs under my knees. You can sit like this without crushing their legs. I am still managing to do this despite being pregnant myself. BTW I've never managed to change standing up - he would just run away.

Dressing too is also a bit of a nightmare!

I've heard that a mirror above the changing mat can help to distract. Also try giving her a toothbrush if she likes to clean her teeth (but how long the novelty will last who can say ...?!)

Original poster

jasper · 10/02/2002 00:37

Thanks all for the advice and sympathy so far. Without wishing this little problem on anyone else I am glad I am not alone.
Thanks SueW and Eulalia for the tips and I will try to pin the wee mite down with my legs while changing.
Good idea about the toothbrush Eulalia,(when is your baby due?) I will try that too. She HATES getting her teeth brushed but loves to play with the toothbrush herself, particularly if given a tube of paste to hold in the other hand. In fact we keep an empty tube of paste just for her to play with so I will get that out at changing time.

OP posts:

Original poster

jasper · 10/02/2002 00:37

OP posts:

Lindy · 10/02/2002 14:42

My DS is exactly the same, I have just tried singing really loud, ridiculous songs (10 litte sausages works well - or change the words to child's name etc) works for a little while!

Hilary · 10/02/2002 19:31

My eldest son used to do this and was always really strong. It would make me so cross and there seemed to be nothing I could do about it. Toys waving and loud singing had no effect. The good news is that he grew out of it at about 2. The bad news is that now my second son does it and, if anything, is worse than his brother used to be! My sanity only remains becuase I keep reminding myself that he is two in only 11 months...

bloss · 11/02/2002 10:15

Message withdrawn

Tigermoth1 · 11/02/2002 17:38

Jasper, snap! my toddler obediently flips over for his his father and childminder and wriggles for me. I change him standing up and have done so since he was able to be vertical. I kneel in front of him and hug him tight. The only way.

Has anyone already advised you to try easy up nappies? Get your toddler in standing mode and up they pop. They're a lifesaver.

Eulalia · 11/02/2002 18:47

Jasper - baby is due 1st April - my Easter egg lol! I forgot to mention that my boy is actuallly 2 1/2 and he is sometimes a lot better. I think it is easier to distract them as they get older, but then again they do get stronger. I just hope not to be in nappies for too much longer.

Hilary · 17/02/2002 22:54

I've just read today's tip and I am intrigued. It is about getting rid of nappy rash by drying the baby's bottom with a cool hairdryer. My questions are as follows; How did she find out that this worked? How would we get our wriggly children to lie still for not only a nappy change but a blow dry too?

I don't doubt it works, if the lady says so, but it did amuse me!

pena · 18/02/2002 08:33

I got a present which has proven a wonderful distractor to baby while changing - its a wooden toy airplane that is suspended from a long piece of spring wire. You're supposed to stick it onto the ceiling. After a few times of struggling with ds - I stuck it above his changing table - changing has now become his fave as he gets to look at the toy plane bouncing up & down.

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