5 Year old boys

[megcleary]

Was at a party for a 5 year old boy today and was surprised at the level of fighting. Mixed group of boys and girls, but some boys were really hitting each other and their faces had real intent.

Is this what they can be like at this age?

At ds1's 5th birthday party I must admit I was surprised at the rowdiness although it appeared to be play fighting rather rather than malicious. It seemed a little calmer once ds got to 8. I find other boys quite full on and it's for this reason that I haven't encouraged play dates.

I have 3 sons and it's constantly like this between them. They're 7, 4 and 9mo. Granted DS3 doesn't join in (yet) but DS1 & 2 are constantly scrapping.

I think most of it is just boys being boys. Although I do step in quite a lot as play fighting can quickly turn into malicious fighting

Bop "Boys being boys" is a terribly unhelpful saying. Boys should all be encouraged to be gentle...and the less of that crap...the sort of wishy-washy excuse ridden claptrap.... the better.

It is boys being boys though! How many girls do you see pretending to be wrestlers and such like? And how many boys do you see dressing up like princesses etc? That would be girls being girls.

I understand that there are boys that like to play games that girls like and vise versa (DS1 used to put my make up on and play with my handbags) and I'm not saying that they shouldn't or anything like that. It's just that the majority of boys like play fighting etc. So they are "being boys" as that's what boys do.

Also, I'm not saying they don't need to be taught to be gentle either. I'm always telling my boys to be gentle and be careful and watch what they're doing etc. This is why I said I tend to step in a lot and separate them

I came on - I know we shouldn't make gender stereotypes but after having two boys and being around lots of their friends I have to admit that they seem to need more physical interaction than girls.

After growing up in a large family of girls I was shocked when I had boys. I took ds1 to the HV because I was convinced he had some sort of disorder because he was incapable of sitting still. [ hmm]

Today we have been in the woods for most of the day they have rolled around on the grass like dogs, grazed their knees , their hands and ds1 has a nasty gash on his side from falling out a tree. We get home and they beg dh for a play-fight. Compared to some of their friends my two are quite tame!

I do encourage quiet activities, they both enjoy cooking and board games but are happiest when they are wrestling or playing zombie slaying.

It's alien to me because I was not like them at all when I was a child. I definitely think they are just wired this way because I haven't encouraged it at all.