2 year old behaviour breaking my heart please help me

[LittleBlondeNinja]

My ds is 2 years 4 months and just started nursery 3 evenings a week. His behaviour has been going downhill for months constant screaming crying etc hitting me kicking me etc he doesnt hit dp and behaves so well for dp but for me he is vile.
I put him in the naughty corner he screams back at me he kicks me when i pick him up he hits me with things. Doesnt listen etc. Im at the end of my teather. He can be so nice and loving little lad but i am so down because of what he is doing.
Please help with any suggestions

Is he tired or showing any signs of a growth spurt? Could nursery be too much for him? Are you able to talk to him at all when he is angry and try and change the direction of his frustration? My DS is almost 3 and he has had times like these when things have been unsettled at home or he has had a developmental growth, we sit and play games to take his mind off or give him the option of taking some time for himself if he can't explain what is wrong, he usually comes back for hugs or just sits and cries until the feeling passes, we do not do time outs but instead offer him the time to calm down if he needs it. As an adult when I've struggled with situations this is how I best cope. I hope you'll be able to help your wonderful little boy. It's terrible seeing them so upset. .

Oh God I know my Dd going through similar. I'm puttingit fdown to molars coming in.... I have the thinking step too and when she tantrums and kicks me I walk into another room leave the door open then when Ican hear her starting to ccalm I distract her with something like I pretend to see a cat in the garden! Sometimes if she isn't kicking but tantrum I'll hold her and rock her ans say I know I know it's hard. I have to admit there are days I'm struggling particularly at 37 week's pregnant I just have to jolly her along all the time but it's exhausting just trying to change her happy can turn into a war! Hopefully someone will have some advice but just so you know your not alone.

It sounds like you are going through the mill a bit, OP! My DD has just turned 2 and won't have anything to do with her daddy at bedtime yet she adores him all the rest of the time, what's that all about?!

I found some really good tips on this website - "Aha Parenting" and I have had some success with both DD2 and my older daughter who is almost 5 and very anxious at the moment, having just started school.

We don't use the naughty step in our house, so I am not an expert but I wonder if maybe 2 years 4 months is a tiny bit young to really "get" it?

In fact, here is a bit about timeouts/naughty corner. :)

Thanks all!! I think we are going to have to change the naughty corner to the thinking step tbh that sounds much better!
when ds goes off screaming he is literally in a frenzy there is no talking to him at all cant pick him up he just screams more etc.
I think he is enjoying nursery and he seems more indepenant and sharing much better since going.
He has loads of toys also but chooses to climb the chest of drawers instead to smear my face creams etc everywhere when i nip to the loo i take him off explain why thats not a good thing to do and ge goes into a frenzy of screams and punches

tonight i put him in the corner and then all he wanted was his bed but he keeps telling me he done a poo poo to try and get out of his cot to get a nappy. He sleeps well normally in his cot but these little screaming fits of wanting to come in my bed are happening more and more...

tomorrow is thinking step and tackling issues day.....roll on bedtime

I like the naughty step behaviour link thanks for that it makes sense i will have to try the positive disipline thing tomorrow and the talking through it instead....

Hi also what I've read in my hours of need is the 1,2,3 method which does work well. So as soon as the naughty behaviour begins you say very calmly that's 1 And put your finger up then if behaviour continues that's 2 And then 3 then very calmly lift and put on thinking step the first couple times I said mummy counted to 3 and you didn't stop so now you sit here and think then after that first few times you don't say anything just lift and step. Then I go back after 20 seconds or so And just open the door for her to come back in you don't ask them to say sorry or explain just carry on as normal if there is a tantrum I usually try and comfort at this point if I get scratched I say that's 3 And walk away biting scratching kicking not given any 1 2 first thAt straight to a 3. When I read this method I was dubious doing it with a 2 year old but it really works. There is a book to help called 123 magic. The other thing I've been doing which you mentioned in your above post is constant remindDr and praise of good behaviour and emotions like oh what a calm happy girl you Hvw been today well done. When agendas busy playing alone I'd usually run off to do housework then wait for her to moan at me before I'd go to her now I interrupt her alone time to say positive things like good girl thank you for playing alone that is so good Nd helps Mummy get things done. I've just been dingbat this week and it feels a but fake sometimes but I think it is helping she has been calmer and warmer this week.

Sorry few typing errors above! Think you can decipher though

My only adice is to ignore him when he is having a tantrum. Make sure he is somewhere safe and wait for him to come out if it before discussing anything/ giving him attention. Make sure he has lots of attention when he is being good, it is sometimes tempting to leave them to it when being good, but it is totally the wrong message. Stay calm, remember you are the adult.

Good luck today, OP. Let us know how you get on.

I also read somewhere that 2 year olds are made for exploring, which explains climbing up to get your face cream!