Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

How can I teach my 3yo DS not to run away?

8 replies

Bibblebo · 09/09/2013 13:40

My 3yo DS runs ahead / runs away and won't usually come when he's called.

Apart from the difficulties I experience (being pregnant and in 3rd trimester), he is also missing out on trips that his nursery would be taking him on. They say that he's 'not quite ready'. I think that they mean that he is difficult to handle when out and about and does things like run ahead, refuse to hold hands etc.

I would appreciate any tips as I'm tired of resorting to shouting and running after him. The doctor says that he does have a glue ear - perhaps this is part of the problem.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
NecessaryWeevil · 09/09/2013 13:43

Reins until he understands he needs to hold hands?
Don't give him the opportunity to run ahead until you know he comes back when he's called (think of it like puppy training!)
You have my sympathies, I had a bolter.

DeWe · 09/09/2013 13:44

My ds had glue ear and the second time he had grommets I was amazed to find that I called him back, and he turned round and came! He actually hadn't been hearing me call him back, he wasn't being naughty.

But if I was in a situation that I really didn't want him to run off he either went in the buggy, or he held my hand-if he let go, I put him on the reins.

RandomMess · 09/09/2013 13:46

Mine either had to hold my hand or be strapped in the pushchair. Only took a few times of carrying out me threat for them to know I meant it and comply.

Prozacbear · 09/09/2013 13:52

Second what RandomMess says - DS is 2.6 and if he doesn't 'walk nicely' then he has to hold my hand - he hates that so it's a great threat.

And then repeat as necessary.

burberryqueen · 09/09/2013 13:53

put him on reins, my son was like this, a bloody liability!

blueberryupsidedown · 09/09/2013 14:04

This takes a bit of work on your part, but it's worth it.

He needs to understand what STOP means.

So you need to play games, many times a day, which include stopping. games such as musical statue, songs that have pauses (such as 'hickory dickory dock' - you whisper STOP when there is a pause in the song), when he reallly gets what it means to say 'stop' then he can ask you to stop - put some silly music on and when he says STOP you have to stop, etc etc.

Another good listening game is to make some giant ears (using an old alice hairband) and walk around in the house and outside the house, trying to get him to listen to the sounds around him. He can hear birds, airplanes, cars, people talking, etc.

Many children, especially those with hearing difficulties, are not learning how to listen and 'tune in' with what's around them. I am sure that if you look up 'listening games' on the web you will find other activities.

Another game we play (I'm a childminder) is to put a lot of small musical instruments/objects that make sounds in a bag, and you pick one of the objects (a small bell for exampe) and make the sound, your son has to guess what it is.

One thing that sometimes work is to have your 'secret code word' (we used to use 'sausages') and when you say that word, your child has to stop and freeze on the spot.

As I said, it's not instant, it takes some work, but it is very good also to prepare a child to listen and can improve their behaviour. Any game that encourages listening would be useful. Sorry about the long post.

BackforGood · 09/09/2013 14:27

What RandomMess said might help him learn, but he'd be wearing reins to keep him safe until then if I were you.

stormedmentor · 09/09/2013 17:30

Reins avec spanking means Wine and Cake all around

New posts on this thread. Refresh page