Separation anxiety after illness?

[Damegemma82]

My almost 1 year old DD has recently become very clingy and upset if I leave the room, she grabs at my shirt looking for my boobs and is fussier with her food. Her night time sleeping pattern (although never been fantastic) has deteriorated to a point where I'm getting up 4-5 times a night and usually giving in and BF at least twice in the night just to get her back to sleep ASAP and me back in bed ASAP! I realize this is probably not helping the situation as she will depend on me and a feed to get her back to sleep. She has had a spate of illnesses that lasted approx a month in total with a water infection at the end of it and 3 days+ of 104 degree temps before correct diagnosis - horrible!
Prior to this her separation anxiety had been mild and no cause for concern as I read almost every baby suffers with it to a certain degree.

My DH is upset as he feels he can't comfort her any more (although I have to say a little more perseverance from him wouldn't go amiss) and I just feel very down about the whole thing as it's awful to feel you are going backwards, with lack of sleep compounding the situation for all of us. I was hoping to start introducing cow's milk when she turns 1 in 2 weeks. This is the first time since she was newborn that I have felt so clueless and frustrated. I should state DD co-slept with us up until approx 8 months old at which point she was feeding from me for comfort several times in the night until DH stepped in and slept on the nursery floor for a week (comforting her when necessary) to get her sleeping in her cot with 1 (sometimes none) night feeds. I guess what I want to know is this all just a result of her illness and will previous behaviour resume in a week or two once her appetite is back up to scratch or do I need to bite the bullet and sit next to a hysterical baby in a cot until she eventually cries herself to sleep? I have never tried this as it feels unnatural to not comfort my child but have read this is the best/only way to teach babies to "self-soothe". Any advice would be much appreciated.
Thanks, Gemma.

Hi Gemma, I hope someone comes along to give you some good advice or reassurance. My ds is 4 now so it feels like a very long time ago that he was the age of your dd. I am sure your dd's previous sleep pattern will resume when she is feeling more settled after her illness. With my ds his sleeping did not settle down until he was 15 months. They are all different. I did not manage to teach my ds to 'self-soothe', if he needed me I was there for him and that is still the case. But it is important you get your sleep and you need to do what you think is best. Best wishes x

it sound like you are doing all the right things so trust your instinct as to what is the right thing to do. You dont want to end up like me with a 4 year old in your bed every night. I hope your dd is ok and feeling better xx