Feeling like a lousy failure of a parent tonight. dd, 6, was playing with a toy as I was making dinner. Ds,almost 3, wanted to play too as dd resisted. Next thing, she turned around and whacked him. Hard. I picked up crying ds, ordered dd to sit in the hall - which she refused - and so I had to lift her out and then had another fight taking the toy off her. She hit my arm - this is honestly a first in terms of physical behaviour - and then as I walked away she threw a shoe at me. I told her that behaviour wasn't on and that she could sit in the garden and cool off. I pushed her outside and as I shut the door she screamed 'my hand'.' She's stuck out her hand into the hinge, which I hadn't realised. We ran it under cold water. Her pinkie is a bit red but I feel like crap. I feel like over the past few weeks we've descended into bad behaviour - kids arguing all the time - and me and DH doing little more than shouting and nagging. I feel that we're failing as parents. I'm devastated tonight and just wonder if anyone could recommend good parenting books? Apologies for long post.