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Help, we have no routine, am at end of my tether. (Sorry long post!)

3 replies

ng1412 · 22/08/2013 09:45

Our DS is 3months old and is EBF. We also have a very lively and high maintenance DD who is 2yo. Our day is extremely hectic and we struggle to have a routine. Most mornings after breakfast consist of my DD having a nap, while I feed our DS and then hopefully he has a nap. He doesn't always though and then it is time for my DD to get up, have lunch and go to creche, I have to take both of them in the car. In the afternoons DS and I are at home on our own and he is able to get about an hour sleep. But he never lets me out of the room, I need to be with him all of the time.

Then evenings are extremely difficult. I feed my DD at 6pm. My DH gets home around 7pm. He bathes my DD and every other day he does my DS. Then DD goes to bed. During this time I am trying to prepare dinner. Then we try to eat but DS always cries and it means one of us holds him while the other eats.

Then we put DS in his bedclothes and bag and BF him until he sleeps on my bed. Then I come in at about 10pm and give him a feed and move him in his crib. He sleeps there until about 1am then the fun starts. I BF him but as he won't sleep in his crib then I just let him sleep with me on the bed. I sleep in a king size bed on my own, DH sleeps in another room as it is easier for him as he works.

DS wakes about 6 times per night for a feed which I do then go back to sleep. I sleep on the edge of the bed, with the duvet wrapped around me from the waist down, I am paranoid about the covers being anywhere near my DS.

Every day I am getting more knackered. I am desperate to change this but don't know where to start! I know I am doing all the wrong things but with our DD as well it is so difficult, DS hardly sleeps when DD is here as she wakes him!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
night1971 · 22/08/2013 09:49

I really feel for you juggling. No great advice but he is just 3 months old. No routine is quite normal at this stage. They just want to be with you all the time. I found from 4 months I could start to introduce a gentle routine but for now it sounds like you are doing well. it won't last forever. You have your DD in a great routine though and he will start to fall into a pattern within the next month or two.

CreatureRetorts · 22/08/2013 17:36

I'm slightly confused - your dd has a nap in the morning? Are you able to shift her crèche hours at all?

Our routine was based on my eldest (who was 2 when younger was born):

Wake up 6/7am feed baby
Breakfast 7am ish
9am feed baby, drop DS to nursery
12pm pick up DS, have lunch,
1pm DS napped
5pm dinner
6pm bath
7pm bed.

I'd feed baby whenever she wanted (within reason). When she moved onto solids her routine slotted into DS's a bit better - she would nap on the way to nursery in the mornin, they'd both nap after lunch and she would have an afternoon nap when we were out until about 7/8 months when she dropped it.

CreatureRetorts · 22/08/2013 17:37

I also kept dd in a sling most of the time so she could nap and she wanted to be in bed by 6pm. I coslept with her until 9 months.

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