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Behaviour/development

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My DS is a berserker

4 replies

HarderToKidnap · 16/08/2013 11:15

He's 20 months. He's mad. Went to a lovely singalong music group yesterday, he spent the entire time running around the back of the venue, occasionally stopping to pick up something and try and eat it. He snatches toys from other kids. He pinches, smacks and bites when he's tired (only me, except he has bitten other kids a few times). He is never still, he empties drawers, posts things behind radiators, throws things ALL DAY. He throws food. He rarely sits and plays with his toys, he'd rather be legging it round destroying/emptying/throwing things. He tantrums at least a few times a week.

He's always told a very firm "no" and put down when he's violent. He has started to lick now which I think is his way of trying not to bite when he wants to bite. I admit I let a lot of the throwing food/emptying drawers go otherwise I would be just constantly telling him off and I can't really see the harm except its just a bit destructive. I've childproofed the dangerous drawers and cupboards.

The only thing which keeps him quiet for any length if time is TV, which I admit we have started to rely on too much. We go out to park once a day and normally something else too so he gets out plenty, he naps once a day for 2 hours and sleeps 12 hours at night. Prob watches 90 mins of tv a day spread over the day.

Can I calm him down in any way? Get him to direct this boundless boundless energy towards something like his toys? Chill him out without TV and dummy? He seems so different to the other children in the NCT group, so much MORE somehow. He is ahead of them vocally and physically but is just a demon! When he's mixing with older children he's a dream though. I just find him very challenging when we are at home or with kids his own age.

OP posts:
kw13 · 16/08/2013 13:25

Not got any really good advice to offer; but your penultimate sentence sounds like it might be a clue. If it's older children that he's looking for - then maybe try and find more environments where he will be sharing with them. Is he at nursery or similar, what do they say? I've noticed in DS's year group that there are children like this - as times goes by they do calm down a little but will often actually just be as you say 'more'. But that can be an incredibly positive thing - they are up for a challenge, will try new things, be enthusiastic, have enormous reserves of energy, organize things, pull others (like my DS) along with them. And 90 minutes of Tv doesn't sound a lot to me! Perhaps he just needs to be doing more physically? Are there any clubs near you that do anything sporty from 2 onwards? Near me there are some rubgy and football ones that might be of interest. Good luck, he sounds wonderful!

BotBotticelli · 16/08/2013 14:06

Hey OP, sorry I don't have any advice as my DS is only 8.5 months old, but I have a distinct feeling he is going to be like your LO when he reaches toddlerhood.

He is already 'more' of a handful than most other babies I meet of his age. He never sits still while he is awake. Even as a little baby at 3mo, he never just lay quietly and gurgled on his mat like the other babies you meet: he was always rawling around, yelling, babbling pulling things, trying to crawl, making a noise, bashing things etc etc. He has just started crawling this week and is now on a mission to destroy my house!!

What I am trying to say is, I think some kids are just born like this. Get out the house at least twice a day and let him cause chaos somewhere else is my current plan, which i suspect will see me through to his teenage years Hmm

HarderToKidnap · 16/08/2013 16:07

Thanks guys. You're right, he IS wonderful. He is also stunningly gorgeous and very small, so looks as if butter just wouldn't melt, so his crazy behaviour often literally has people gawping! He is so confident it's unreal, but very affectionate. We went to a secure field the other day, so I decided to let him run to see how far away he'd get before wanting to come back, he was a mere dot in the distance and trying to scale the fence before I gave in and went to fetch him...

He's lovely with the childminder, he has one day a week there with two older children. He's with a grandparent one day a week too and they all report how fab he is, they do however devote 100% attention to him which I don't as also have housework etc to do and besides I am just not constitutionally designed to spend all that time purely focused on him! My real concern in the violence to other kids though, the rest I can live with if I'm allowed some wine occasionally!

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HarderToKidnap · 16/08/2013 21:54

Bumping for the evening crowd

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