Toddler weight gain.....advice please

[popsycal]

I know I advocated the burning of weight charts on another thread last week.......however!

Bit of background. DS was born 7Lb 10oz at 38 weeks right on the 50th centile line. Since birth, he has gradually progressed up the centile lines and eventually settled just below the 91st centile line. He has also always been exactly on the 91st centile line for height - so in proportion.

When he was little, I dreaded taking him to get weighed as he used to scream, I used to stress about his weight gain and he would pee everywhere so I stopped taking him once I went back to work in January 2003. I got him weighed just after his first birthday and height and weight bang on the 91st line - 25lb 14oz. Fine - a chunky monkey but in proportion.

Today my mum decided that she would take him to get weighed at a clinic near her as my sis was taking her daughter to get weighed. He is now 31lb and just below the 98th centile line and the 'dreaded shaded area' at the top of the graph. She didn't get his height measured which I always insist on doing if I brave the clinic.

I have spent the last half hour stressing about this whole weight thing, worrying if he is too heavy and worrying whether we should
get it checked out. The HV didn't seem concerned at all but she wasn't my usualy health visitor.

In my heart of hearts, I know that DS is a good eater but a healthy eater. He rarely has snack food and really enjoys friut and vegetables and I am eternally grateful for that. He doesn't drink excessive amounts of milk (between 12 and 15 oz of full fat cows' milk per day). So my gut reaction is that I should burn the charts.

However, there is still a niggle in my mind. It is possibly to do with the fact that at 3 days old, he developed severe jaundice and was in special care receiving triple phototherapy and was on a drip. His SBR levels were extremely high - at blood transfusion level for a period - and took over two weeks to stabilise and his colouring lasted until about 6 weeks. Despite every test under the sun being done (his poor little heels were like a pin cushion), the conclusion was that his problems were of 'unknown cause'. All his follow up checks show that his development is perfectly normal.

Sorry this is long!

So what I am asking you wise people is:
a. should I worry about ds's weight?
b. should i worry about him crossing all those centile lines even though the HV doesn't seem to be?
c. should I modify his diet so that he stabilises on this centile line? (no....?)
d. is there any possible link with his problems at birth and the accelerated weight gain (my knowledge of the function of the liver etc isn't very good......)
e. am I being totally crazy, neurotic and paranoid?

Answer to e may well be a resounding YES! However, such a trivial thing is niggling away and widing me up!

Thanks to those of you who have stayed with this thread so far!
Popsy x

Not sure about D) but I would doubt it and I would say no to the rest of them. except E) where I'll say we all do it!

I wouldn't worry Pops. When dd1 was born, she was only 6lb 6, but started putting on weight so rapidly , she was off the centiles completely! They sent her to a growth clinic, who basically just pinched her fat, said she was fine, and if anything was ever done, it wouldn't be until she was at least 7 anyway. So I said I'll just bring her back then if I need to. The dietician was happy with her food too.

She's a very tall string bean now, instead of a michelin man with jelly rolls .

Thanks emma and lou!
My gut feeling is that he is fine......but you know!

Would the hv think i was mad if i rang her up to discuss it? cant make clinics as i work (and would avoid it at all costs anyway).

Would she thikn I was a neurotic mum who read too many books about childcare??

I daren't even search the internet for information!

am embarrassed that such a little trivial thing is doing my head in so much
and am cross with mum for taking him to be weighed

a. NO
b. No
c. No
d. Definately not.
e. Possibly We all have our moments of panic as mums.

Having had 4 children going through this stage I have always noted that weight seems to go up just before a growth spurt.You get a little fat tummy and next thing it slims down again as they grow a few inches.

He sounds as though he eats well and healthily. You do not need the scales to tell you if he is overweight - you will see it. Again the hazards of weighing - do not let you mum do that again
He only needs height and weight done as part of medical assessment.
By all means have a chat with your HV to settle your mind, that is what she is there for.

Popsy

Had similar worries but DD2 was underweight!

DD2 was born a bouncing 8lb 12 1/2 oz baby - initially weight gain was going OK.

Gradually she started to level and stopped putting weight on. At her 2year check, she weighed just 22lb

HV was jumping up and down, wanting her referred here, there and everywhere. Had DD2 been my first, I might have panicked but I thought HV was over-reacting.

DD2 was eating OK - not great, but she was otherwise very healthy, slept very well and had masses of energy. Because HV was so jumpy about it, I did make an appointment with GP just to make sure DD2 was OK.

He said "she is perfectly healthy, sleeps well and is active - what exactly do you want me to do?"

Described her as a typical picky eating toddler, hence weight, but other than that, had no concerns.

Came home, chucked charts in the bin and have NEVER seen a HV since that day!

DD2 is now 4.5, starts school in September and although she is a slight build, is very tall for her age. She is a perfectly healthy, intelligent and beautiful little girl - and although she is still fussy with food - has got better!

Hope this reassures you a bit.

Popsycal, i am the same as you. My DS2 is 22 months, and about 35 pounds when last weighed. He is very tall as well. He was 8lb 6oz at birth, and since then has nearly always been off the charts for weight and height.
I know he eats healthy, and walks and runs around alot, so in a lot of ways it doesn't worry me. But what does worry me is what other people say. They don't believe he is the age he is...he is in age 3-4 clothes. I have always had comments about him being big, even fat, and it really upsets me, as he is the joint most beutiful boy in the world (along with DS1, who is very thin?) Sorry not to be much help, just letting you know you are not alone!

My DD spent the went from 91st to 98th and then into weight watchers zone by about 6 months and remained there until about 2/2.5 is now 3.9 and has weighed the same for the last 12 months or so. (According PsIL who are the only people who weigh her!)

So to answer your questions:

(a) NO
(b) NO
(c) NO
(d) What accelerated weight gain? Approx 5lbs in the year between ages 1 and 2 - surely that is not excessive?
(e) YES

Popsy my dd has always been in the top 10% on those charts.

I haven't had her weighed for 6 months as I can look at her and see that she isn't overweight - as mears says she gets a bit of a tummy then shoots up a bit and looks quite skinny almost!

She is certainly not thin but with parents like dh and I, I would not expect a Kate Moss style baby lol!

Don't worry, you would be able to see if your DS was fat, and he eats healthily which is important

Also...

after that experience, I had decided that if I was to have another baby, I certainly wouldn't bother with baby weighing/clinics!

sorry forgot to add that he is only 18 months

Thanks everyone
sainshar - i get those comments too
Although he isn't overwieght, he has the cubby little wrists and thighs

but he runs around like a lunatic and as eveyone keeps saying - it will all 'fall off' in time!!!

Thanks again for your comments folks - very much appreciated!

Popsycal. just do what i do. When people are rude about how 'big' he is, i say "yes, he is a big lad, isn't he. When he gets a bit older, i will tell him what you sais, and get him to come around and sort you out!!" It's funny, it is normally people who are overweight themselves who say the most hurfull things.

You are rigth saintshar - it doesnt bother me as much as it used to...the comments have died down
if they say what do you feed him on
i say 'lard - what am i supposed to give him??'

Echo the advice already given ie don't worry ! (And the answer to 'e' is you're just being a mum)

My dd was bang on 75th centile at birth and for a while afterwards before illness sent her spiralling down to under 50, and I got huge grief from the hv as I was breastfeeding exclusively still and she was convinced that was why dd lost ground (never lost weight, just didn't 'progress' ).

She's now at 75%+ weightwise but height is similar (our hv's NEVER have checked height so why they obsess so about weight is a complete mystery), like Mears' kids, she goes round then taller.

Also, I'd guess from your post he's around 18 months old ? If so, his mobility & consequent physical activity levels will start to rocket soon, so any perceived imbalance will flatten out.

Stop worrying chuck, he sounds like a healthy, happy child & if he gets ill you'll be glad he's at the top end cos it's amazing how fast they 'shrink'.

oh sorry, posts crossed ! I now know he's 18 months .

I know i should't get so touchy about it. But after some of the comments i have heard, it is hard not to.
I saw a man the other day that i haven't seen for a while. He called my DS a tellytubby. I got a strop on and started to tell him that it wasn't nice to call him that, he is not fat by any means..... he stopped me mid flow and said "no, don't be offended, i only said it because when i first saw him he sai "eh-oh" to me like the tellytubbies say." God, can you imagine how embarassed i felt!!!

I have a very similar ds popsy. He was 7lb 2oz and on the 25th centile at birth. I had a lot of problems with breastfeeding and he ended up in hospital with jaundice and dehydration at 3 days having lost 10% of body weight. Since then however, he has done amazingly well and at 18 mths weighs 31.5 lbs and is 85 cm tall. He eats healthily (99% of the time anyway) and is still breastfed, also very active and full of energy. I get comments about his size but more about his energy levels. He is definitely not fat just a happy healthy active boy, who doesnt go anywhere near my health visitor. HTH

Oh Incywincy - that goodness someone is in an almost identical situation to me!!!!

I could have killed my mum today - she knows I avoid the scale with him....my ds is actually nearer 90cm actually!!

I am now relaxed.....thanks incywincy!

My DD is 2.2 years old. When she was born she was bang on 50th centile. Now her weight is over the 98th centile (in the middle of the red shaded area) while her height is just over the 75th centile. I have talked to the GP and HV and both say she looks fine, so I'm not worried. She has a broad back basically and really needs size 3-4 clothes. I just think of her as a big strong girl! Popsycal, it's best not to get hung up on those silly charts.

It's weird isn't it? My dd is 16 months now, is 82 c.m. tall (I measured her yesterday) and on the chart that means she's in that top shaded area. Yet she weighs only 19lbs!! We joke that she'll be a super model she really does look very lanky at even her age. But in my worried mommy mind if her weight matched her height (like your ds) I probably wouldn't worry. So I'd answer no to all your questions but a big YES to the last one!!

Thanks Snowbell and Evita!!
I have thougth about my mad rant today and chatted to afew friends at work who know DS and they think I am crazy for worrying! I think I am crazy for worrying so there you go!

He is gorgeous - and I measured his ehight today and it is the the shaded area so taller than he should be for his weight!!!

Thanks for all your advice folks!

Hi popsy - sounds like you've had great advice all round. Ds1 was just like this as baby/toddler ... now he is 6.5 - happy, healthy, slim, and the tallest out of his year of 60 children, and the biggest feet, despite being a July birthday.

You just need to get used to everyone thinking he's older than he is, and consequently expecting more of him.

You shouldn't worry about DS's weight, my DD was also very jaundiced at birth and put on weight rapidly, she was only 5lb when she was born and soon became quite chunky. When I took her to the doctors when she was ill he said a bit of extra weight can be useful for children as if they do not want to eat (when poorly) then they can live off their body fat and so eliminates the worry of force feeding them and potential problems. Feel reassured that your son will lose this weight as he grows my DD is now 4 and has lost much of her chubbiness. Ignore peoples comments rather have a chunky monkey who is happy and healthy then a sad child on a diet. Best Wishes