My nearly two year old keeps hitting and kicking me.

[Readallaboutit1]

I am 39+5 weeks pregnant and I am exhausted by his behaviour.

I've tried the naughty step, saying a sharp 'no' and distracting but he keeps hitting me, he is very strong so I am unable to pick him up from the floor at the moment due to being heavily pregnant.

Any ideas please? :(

Is he after attention? I know it's awful at this stage when you have a toddler too....is he getting one to one time with you though? In my experience the BEST deterent is to briefly ignore them....I used to immediately leave the room without saying a word.....except NO. then I would go into to the loo and lock myself in it for about one minute.

I'd do something like what NeoMaxi describes. Coupled with making sure he has plenty of attention from you when he's being good.

I would start immediatley though, because if it is an attention thing, it could get worse once the baby arrives :(

There is a technique/ strategy that is supposed to really work. Basically you set aside 15 mins a day to do what ever your child chooses and call it something like 'mummy time' during this time other people including family members and siblings cannot interrupt. You follow their lead with a calm activity like Lego, simple puzzles or playdoh. And make lots of simple comments like -'your building a big tower' etc and give specific praise so not just 'your a good boy' but 'your great at putting the little blocks together'. Don't ask too many questions and don't get them to do anything hard or teach them anything and don't use complicated language or talk about anything too emotive. If after the 15 mins is up you want to carry on the activity say 'mummy time is finished now but i'd like to play a bit longer'. Never use taking away special time as a punishment. It's great when you have more than one child to help them feel special and give them some one to one. I know it sounds really simple but I've seen it work wonders with lots of different types of children.

Have you tried redirection e.g. You cannot hit mummy. You can hit the sofa, punch a pillow, or kick a ball outside, but we don't hit/kick people.

Perhaps he is acting out something that is worrying him - the new baby seems the obvious one. It might be worth having a chat with him in a separate, calm time (bedtime is a great one) to reassure him that you will still love him when the new baby comes, and that it's okay for him to feel sad or angry or worried if he does feel those things. He's going to have to share you, his mummy who was only his and he has never had to share with anybody before, with this new person he's never met and he doesn't even know if he likes yet! It's a really big thing for a toddler, and it's something that you have to help him through because you know he will benefit immensely in the future from having a brother or sister. It's just hard for him in the short term, so be understanding and reassuring.

Perhaps you could start a ritual similar to what Amiee describes so that he knows whatever happens, however much the new baby demands your attention he will still have "mummy time" once a day or a bedtime story or something similar to hold on to which is just yours & his.

Thank you so much for the replies and suggestions.

I am with him 24/7 and I have been since he was born, I can't see how it would be for attention as we spend all day with each other.

He has stopped liking me singing to him and reading books with him, I'll say 'Come on Mummy will read a book to you' and he will shout 'No', We have a bedtime story every night and he does love this but during the day he just doesn't seem to want to interact no matter how exciting I make it seem. He will also throw things when he doesn't get his way or he is frustrated.

He doesn't walk up to me and hit me, when I ask him to do something like come for his lunch he gets angry and hits me, I have got down to his level and said 'We don't kick others, it hurts Mummy' but he doesn't listen.

Feel very sad that he is behaving like this, he has never been like this before :(

Is he getting enough excersise? Its hard when you're pregnant but perhaps a walk to the park before lunch?

Also what's his diet like? Much sugar or processed foods? Juice?

The best bit of advice I have ever had about parenting is everything's a phase! That doesn't mean you shouldnt try and manage it but you doing everything you should so it won't last forever.