Am I just being neurotic?

[Fergie28]

Hi,

I've just joined this site because I'd really welcome some views on my son's development.

He's only 7 weeks old, so I know it's very early days, but I'm becoming increasingly concerned that something's not right. Both GP and HV have barely listened - with HV just dismissing me as a 'perfectionist' who is shocked that my baby doesn't come with an instruction book.

This is what I've noticed:

• Since birth, he's had no rooting reflex - so if you stroke his cheek he doesn't turn his head. In fact he barely seems to notice.
• We had feeding problems at the start, but even now it's still a struggle to latch him. He turns his head up and down and puts hands in mouth.
• He will very rarely look at anyone's face - and only if he's on his back. He never looks at me while nursing.
• He doesn't track anything.
• He does beautiful smiles - but seems to smile as readily at the wall as at me.
• He does coo - but not often.

What do people think? Am I expecting too much at 7 weeks? Or am I right to be worried?

Hope someone can help.
Bump.

I think your instincts are screaming at you that there's something wrong and that alone is a good enough reason for him to be seen by a paediatrician.

It's impossible to pass a useful opinion about the specific concerns you have because there's so much detail you'd only get by actually seeing him.

If you see the paed and there is nothing to worry about you will feel reassured. If the paed has a concern at least you will have raised it good and early giving him the best chance to benefit from early intervention.

A appointment would take a little while to come through and, in the meantime, your concerns may have evaporated and you can cancel it.

Hard to tell because we all worry a bit too much in the first few weeks but equally your instincts are there for a reason. Get him checked out properly but try not to worry. He's still very young so plenty of time to develop.

Also, if you're not feeling 100% (and who is seven weeks after childbirth!) that will affect how you see things.

I think it is possibly a little early to say these are problems.
I have no idea about the rooting reflex, but the others sound fine to me.
Ds1 didn't smile at all until 8 weeks old, wouldn't look at me etc.

Go and see your GP and tell them you are concerned and would like a referral.
Try to go in with a strong frame of mind - IME, GPs are very good at undermining a mothers instinct!
Good luck.

Totally agree with the above. Push for another opinion if your dr or hv are not giving you the time you deserve to listen to your concerns.
More thank likely you have absolutely nothing to worry about, but by doing this it will put your mind at rest!
You are not neurotic, you are a mother who loves her baby and wants the best for him.

I would wait another couple of weeks before seeing a paed, TBH (unless you think he's not getting enough to eat). They don't do much in the first weeks and none of the things you mentioned sound that odd to me. I'm not a professional though - and the internet is not a source of professional advice.

Sounds just like my now-5yo was at that age. And then suddenly he did what the book said.

Have you had your postnatal check? Here it's at 6-8w. Voicing your concerns there would be totally fair.

What do you think is wrong? If anything it only sounds like his sight isn't developing as fast as you'd like. Babies can't see very far in front of their faces - if he is looking at the wall he might be looking at shadow patterns. How does he react to very strong contrasts nearby, eg putting a bright red t-shirt on his white sheet?

My DS1 never rooted or turned his head when I stroked his cheek. I just had to wait till his mouth opened and jam my breast in! He's now a healthy 7yo.

Not smiling at people is very normal at this age.

Keep an eye on things, but from the info you have given he sounds fine to me.

Thank-you all so much for your replies. It's very reassuring to know that I'm not mad (ladypop, your kind words nearly made me cry!) and also that it's not unusual. I've never known a baby not to have a rooting reflex before so it's good to know he's not the only one.

My 8 week check should be week after next so if there's been no developments by then I'll push for a referral. I don't even know what I think is wrong - it's just an instinct.