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Behaviour/development

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9 year old depressed and tearful

2 replies

juliemill · 04/07/2013 17:41

Help !, my lovely jolly little girl has suddenly overnight turned into a sad and lonely little girl. She seems very depressed, has been crying every night - when asked she says I don't know. She doesn't want any friends over, doesn't want to do anything at all. She is quite clingy, has said she doesn't want to go to school and wants to be with me. She is 9 years old and is beginning to show signs of a few very wispy hairs under her arms, slight increase in chest - but very mild. She said to me the other day she wanted to die.... I'm really concerned. I did speak to her teacher on Friday before this happened and the teacher said that she was ok at school and that she was happy, but it is really worrying. I think she is going to burst into tears... she has only just turned 9 but is tall for her age... any one else had the same experience ?, I'm thinking of taking her to the doctor ??? We did move schools and house early April but I thought all was ok, she certainly had made some nice friends and was really happy....

OP posts:
SnoopyLovesYou · 04/07/2013 18:23

I think you and her need some girly treats!!!!!!

Cinema, window shopping for a possible bra, DVDs, delicious take aways...

This will make you both feel better and may have an added bonus of her opening up to you.

Don't for gods sake take her to the doctors just yet!!!!!!

JohFlow · 04/07/2013 19:33

There seems to be two things here... your concerns that she may be developing early and her sudden change in mood/behaviour - which you appear to be taking an appropriate maternal response to. It may be that she feels different about herself and/that she may be bullied at school (consistent with the new behaviours you describe) or that recent changes are just starting to dawn on her. You were absolutely right to approach her teacher who will be able to suggest what happens (predominantly) in the classroom; but sometimes some incidents slip through the net in corridors/ the playground. The average age for girls puberty seems to be getting earlier and earlier ( I have read average of 10 years at the moment). Sadly; it seems that before they have had a full childhood they move on! I think the best that you can do at the moment is to remain approachable and supportive and let her relax with you (as Snoopy suggests above). Sometimes it takes a child some time to put adult words to a new experience they are having. Sometimes; also a little disclosure about your experience of growing up may act like a conversation starter(?) Good luck x

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