Worried my DS may have a developmental delay

[juneau]

DS2, aged 2.1, has severely delayed speech (6-12 months), and has just started speech therapy. This morning, at the end of session two, the therapist said that while she sees no pointers for developmental delay, she thinks I should take him to see a paediatrician to get it ruled out. There are medical reasons for his speech delay, but I feel completely floored by this recommendation and, when I think about it, there are things about my DS's development that are frustrating me and I wonder if they're red flags.

To give a couple of examples:

• he doesn't know his animals. If I say 'What noise does the cow make?', he doesn't know, even though we've looked at animals and discussed their noises over and over and over;
• words that I use every day - like 'tissue' - he doesn't even attempt to say, he just points to his nose or sniffs/blows loudly;
• he seriously mispronounces common words like spoon - he can't say 'sp';
• he calls all deli meats/fish salmon (well not 'salmon', but his word for salmon), seemingly not understanding that they're all different.

I can't think of any other specific examples at the moment, but these little niggles have been growing recently. Am I just over-analysing, or does this sound familiar if your DC has been diagnosed with a developmental delay? He also has an indentation on his tongue that the ST commented upon.

My DS2 also has a speech delay (has slight glue ear, which doesn't help), and is 2.2, so just a little older than your DS. He cannot do any of the things from your list, either. I'm not sure if it is a development delay - certainly when I saw HV for his 24-month check, she said that he is around 4-5 months behind, but nothing to worry about and he would probably catch up in his own time. We have an SALT assessment in August, which I suspect will tell me more.

However, remembering DS1 when he was the same age, he could not do all of these things, just some of them, and he has not been diagnosed with any sort of delay, in fact, his pre-school teachers tell me he is bright.

I know how worrying it can be, but try to focus on the things your DS CAN do. So, for my DS2, I can see that he is physically about a year ahead of his brother in terms of development, and he is also a very sociable little chap, who plays well with others. And he loves music. These are his strengths and it helps me to think of these when I am worried about other areas.

My ds is 2.3. He is only now learning his animals. He never says the end of words. Only now starting to use a few little sentences/put words together. The health visitor says he is behind, and he's currently going through some assessment and diagnosis for ADHD/as.

Saying that, I know quite a few little boys who are not that far ahead. Some even more behind, and the health visitors have just said they will catch up in their own time.

The worst bit is that its frustrating for the child ( swell as the parent!) Mybds gets really upset when he can't communicate. I've found that flash cards have helped a little bit. That and just constantly talking to him. ( yes I may well be that loud parenting crazy woman walking down the street but it works)

This probably hasn't been any help at all, but just wanted to sympathize a little bit. Not nice to be worrying about them :-( but it will all work out. Some kids just all of a sudden start talking! My brother barely said a word until 3 years old.....he's 20 now and too bloody intelligent and ahead of himself for his own good :-D

Erm, the speech actually sounds within normal range for that age. DC2 (no delays) still can't say s and certainly couldn't do sp or st at that age. Sp is quite a late sound to come isn't it? Neither would have reliably known animal noises and DC1 (was delayed) couldn't point to any animals in stories at all. DC1 did have a mild developmental delay and couldn't speak understandably at all, used the end syllable of words or repeated the end of what I'd said, or used the first syllable of a word repeated twice.

2 years and 1 month is still really really little I wouldn't expect a child who has only just turned two to know different deli meats for example! Are you unfortunate enough to spend a lot of time with other two year olds who are advanced in their speech? Btw round here they don't usually refer for speech therapy until 2 and a half unless there is obvious medical reason.

I think if they're your only red flags I think your ds is fine. I think you're over analysing things (and I mean that in a nice way). I think the paediatrician visit is just a bit of a tick box exercise.

I think you need to relax and stop being hard on the little man. Just do what he enjoys doing and take him nursery if you can. That helped my son.

Thanks confused. Your DS sounds very much like mine. My DS had a bad case of glue ear for many months (we don't know how long, but possibly much of his life), and he had grommets fitted last month. The surgeon (who hadn't thought our DS was a very urgent case and we'd had to really push to get it done), admitted after the surgery that his ears were full of really thick gluey stuff and it was a good thing he'd had it done

Despite that, he's hit all his physical milestones, he's tall for his age, happy, sociable, popular at nursery, plays nicely with others, shares, communicates quite effectively without much speech, and also loves music and dancing.

TBH I can't remember if DS1 could say 'sp' at 25 months, but I do remember that just after his second birthday he started to speak a lot. He was unusually eloquent though, so perhaps its not a fair comparison. It's really hard thinking that he might have something more than just the hearing issues, which I'd got used to, as an idea. I so hope it's just the ST being cautious. Good luck with your SALT assessment anyway - I found it very helpful.

With all that other information, it doesn't sound like there is a problem other than the glue ear, which has now been resolved.
DS1 had 6 (yes, 6) words at his 2 year check. Aged 4 there is no indication he is behind on anything.

DS2 is 26 mths. He can name animals / animal sounds, probably wouldn't attempt tissue. He can say "sp" - I've just had him fetch me a spoon and tell me what it was, as I wasn't sure! Every female currently is Mummy, and every shop tesco - I wouldn't worry about the deli meats!

In fact, he sounds fab, and how his ears are sorted, I'm sure he'll start pick up the speech. But if the thread's has suggested a review, there is no harm - even if all it does is reassure you where he stands.

Okay, I'll try to relax. Thanks for the reassuring messages - it's nice to know there are lots of DC out there at the same sort of level, about whom no concerns have been raised.

It's so worrying though isn't it. First of my dd is well over 3 and didn't learn her animal noises until nearly her 3rd bd and is still not secure on some. She also cannot say /s/ unless you really focus her attention on making it, and cannot yet blend it into a word. We are also in ST and making negligle progress but have a way to go before developmental delay is ruled out and speech disorder is ruled in. Your DS actually sounds way, way ahead of my DD at the same age :) It is worrying but I think you are doing all you can. Having further assessments may help reassure you too.

Indentation on his tongue?

He could well be tongue tied which can cause a whole heap of problems including speech delay and ENT trouble.

Has he ever been checked by someone who knows what they are looking for?

He's been under the care of an ENT consultant and no one has ever mentioned the tongue indentation before. He never had a problem feeding as a baby, so tongue tie was never looked at. Who would be the 'right person' to look at it?

Where are you based?

Herts

It is probably worth contacting Malcolm Levinkind in North Finchley. He trained with Dr Kotlow and can laser tongue and lip ties without using GA. It might be possible to send him pics, worth an ask.

There is also a group on FB called Tongue Tie Babies Support Group where people post photos and get opinions. Obviously not a diagnosis, but pointers on what to look for and what to do about it. Lots of photos to look at am compare with your DSs tongue.

DS1 had multiple problems which I have since learned were related to his ties and oral structure which was affected by the incorrect tongue action. He had congestion and hearing loss, but not as bad as needing grommits.

And, yes, totally possible to breastfeed well with some ties and yet have other problems.

Thanks very much mawbroom. I'll certainly take a look at the FB page and see if I can get an idea whether his tongue is an issue. If it looks like it is, I'll take it further.