Sibling arguing/fighting

[mixedmamameansbusiness]

We have 3 otherwise wonderful DSs. 7,5 and 2. All they seem to do is argue and fight.

It is beginning to wear me down. They scream and shout at each other at the top of their voices, DS2 particularly seems to do shrill, whiny noise everytime anyone looks at him the wrong way which then escalates. They are constantly just calling me telling tales in each other.

They seem to otherwise like each other and can play nicely.

I have tried, intervening, removing one or more from the situation, separating them, leaving them to it to just let then sort it out themselves, shouting, engaging in other activities etc.

Any further ideas?

My oldest had a strong sense of justice and the elder child's typical desire to please. I explained to him that telling me or DH about actions that were potentially dangerous was okay because he was helping his younger DSis. But coming to us whining because he didn't like what she was doing or because she was committing a minor infraction was tale-telling.

Focus on the two older boys. Say DS2 comes tattling to you, ask him to go back and talk to DS1. Then praise DS1 for stopping and paying attention to his brother. Repeat ad infinitum. They'll learn to interact without you refereeing.

Best tip I was told: tell them next time someone yells or comes tale telling when it is not a safety concern, the screamer/tattler gets the same punishment as the other(s).

I like the idea of the same punishment for the tattler.

Oh I am using that Donkeys

Mixed Mine are 6, 3.5 and 21 months and are EXACTLY the same!

Will be watching this thread with interest.

At least it isn't just us. It is just so demoralising when we are doing nice things and they just want to fight.

Yes us as well with 3 DCs (9, 6 and 3). Sometimes they scream at each other in the garden and I have to bring them in for fear of the neighbours thinking we are the family from hell. The funny thing is that if two of them are together, any 2 of the 3 then they tend to play nicely. 3 together, there's just more going on...and more to go wrong. Sometimes I send the warring factions up to their separate bedrooms. I try not to intervene too much.