DS 2.7 doesn't want to go to bed anymore

[rumbelina]

Since we did our own version of controlled crying when he was a year old, DS has never had any bother going to bed.

Napping is a whole different story for another day but bedtime has always been fine.

Then 2 things happened: potty training and - what I believe to be the real problem - received an email from mumsnet, you know the 'what your child is doing now' one, which basically said "your child might not want to go to bed anymore and will want to stay up with you/play, will find any excuse to keep you there and talking". And I READ IT OUT LOUD TO DH. And DS must have heard me, despite not actually being in the house at the time.

So now we have questions, wees, poos, wanting to play, wanting more stories. We mostly are firm/ignore but it's hard when it involves the toilet and his poo cycle seems to be set at approx 45 minutes after bedtime. Plus his mind just seems to have gone into overdrive. We wondered if he needed to drop his nap so tried at the weekend having some quiet TV time instead of a sleep but all that happened was when we got into the car to go out later, he conked out within 2 minutes.

Will it calm down? Is it exacerbated by sunlight and will it improve in winter? He still has his bars on the cotbed - no plans to remove these anytime soon, particularly as he is in the attic so 2 floors away from us if we need to keep putting him back in bed. We are moving soon though so that might help. Or make things worse.

I'm happy for him that he is so excited by the world but bloody hell child, just settle down so I can have my tea!

Blimey, this sounds like my DS, who is 2.11.

It might be that the nap is on the way out, which is a really mucky transition (well, it was for us). It takes a while for them to get used to not having one. I work on the don't offer/don't refuse basis now. As my DS wakes very early (between 4.50 & 5am), it's a horribly long day for all of us. I'd rather he didn't nap as then he goes to bed more willingly, but it's not always that black and white, is it?

Could you reduce the nap to an hour/hour and a half, or just not offer it (my DS would only nap in the car), and on those days take him up a bit earlier? Or go up 10 minutes earlier to compensate for the messing around, and go with the for a bit.

It's so confusing, isn't it?! As for the poo cycle, we had that too, with DS pooing at 4am. For a year. Potty training sorted that, so he now poos in the day. Could you do lots of big praising for pooing on the potty in the day time (choc buttons or a small toy, sticker?). You might be able to shift the timing a little over a few weeks?

HTH. And good luck!!

Thanks SharkSkinThing - good name btw.

He only naps for 30/45 minutes anyway, only in the car under duress, (except at nursery where he is good as gold and toddles off to the sleep room). I think we'll keep trying without at the weekend though. He would never, ever, ask for a nap - I would fall down in a faint if that happened, he has fought napping since he was 6 weeks old - too busy and excited.

I don't think he can help pooing in the evening - you can tell there's one coming as he starts farting around teatime. But yes I will try encouraging him to poo after tea instead, chocolate buttons would no doubt do the trick :) I just want to be careful of forcing him to poo when he's not ready but I can bribe him to sit on the potty for a while though so it might come naturally.

Dds like this and she doesn't nap anymore. I think it's just their age. Be consistent and it will pass (I hope!)

Rumbelina - right back atcha on the name front!

Naps have been hell for us too. Which is why I am quite happy to sort of force DS out of them (but not in a cruel way, he does sometimes need a little one!).

You could always ask the nursery to drop the nap on those days, so you don't have to deal with it! Then off to bed a bit earlier whilst he gets used to the transition.

I know what you mean about forcing him on the poo front, but just give it weeks and don't stress over it (as I have done in the past). You could just sit him on the potty whilst he's watching a bit of telly after lunch and having quiet time (if that's what you do), and what will be, will be!

These kids. Seriously. None of this is in the books, is it?

xx

DS often doesn't nap anymore during the day and when he does, it takes a lot longer for him to go down. And he doesn't nap at home, ever, anymore - just in the car. Increasingly we just skip the day nap and work on the basis that we should avoid car journeys of more than 5 minutes after about 3:30 pm. In the beginning he'd pass out instantly as soon as he was in the car seat but increasingly even if he's tired, he'll stay awake longer and longer in the car and in fact, tries to stay awake.

Bling - yes, that's the same as us.