"I don't like boys' things, mummy": gender stereotyping sweeps the Inferiority Complex

[motherinferior]

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHno. The pink socks (see rants passim) are bad enough. I have yielded on vile plastic dolls. I am prepared to yield on Bratz. The general tidal wave of girliness that suffuses the Inferiority Complex has some quite enjoyable (if pink and sparkly) aspects. But when my not quite three year old gestures to the "boys' toys" ands says she "doesn't like those" I start to get worried. I see her refusing to study physics, and just looking for a Big Strong Man to take care of her and not worry her pretty little head about things and oh dear oh dear oh dear did Emily Wilding Davison die in vain, eh?

Eh???

Reassure me, this too shall pass...or will it?

JanH I think that the gender rebels are still looking for a role model to cling onto - but they are repelled by the extremes of their designated role. And who can blame them? I mean, if I was a little girl I would be utterly repelled by the media's vision of the future for me. Boys, make up, frilly dresses....
and if I was a boy I wouldn't be too impressed either.

"gender rebels", great term, harpsi!

The thing about the one I mentioned who is 14 now is that she was already being a boy at the age of 3, and insisted on boys' trousers, shoes etc when she went to school at 4, which seems very early to me. Maybe she had issues with her mother's choice of clothes or something.

(I would love to know whether she's still being a boy or whether hormones kicking in would have made a difference.)

\link{http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0704340909/qid=1148136410/sr=8-1/ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i1_xgl/203-0186235-9203931\This book} is INCREDIBLY illuminating about all this. It doesn't necessarily help, but sheds a LOT of light on how all this comes about. Should be required reading for mums of girls and boys. (Good read, too :))

Ah Jan, yes, I do see what you mean. I wasn't sure whether you were saying "and do you know any more about this?" or "a-ha! that's showed your argument up for a load of toss, hasn't it?"

I am just spouting off the top of my head and don't actually know much about it. I think HC may have the right idea. Or just some wires have got crossed at an early age? No bad thing IMO, we need rebels as HC says.

Ah franch do you know, that book is probably where I get 90% of my knowledge on the subject from. So eye-opening - really marvellous.

Brilliant, isn't it franny? You're the first person I've come across who's read it - ought to be a bestseller.

The 'pink' phase passes. Dd is now proud to tell me that she is a now a 'sort of a tom boy'.

There is nothing much that you can do, as I'm sure you have laid the groudwork of sexual equality, it will pass. You just have to ride it out, and keep giving positive role models etc

I love that book franch and it makes it perfectly clear where all these stereotypes are coming from - overwhelmingly from the media and from our own (perhaps unwillingly picked up) biases. Nearly everyone I know insists these differences are genetic - bollocks I say.

But Franny, clearly our hunter-gatherer ancestors evolved to have gender-based interests, like trucks, diggers, and pink pink pink. Duh.

Hmm, I don't actually dispute that certain character traits and skills are IMO genetic, for evolutionary reasons. But yes not being obsessed with pink.

Ds is very fond of pink ATM and often says it's his favourite colour. He's starting playgroup soon so I expect he will learn not to :(

I am the least feminine woman you will ever meet...Grant Mitchell has a bigger feminie side than me!

But DS had a pink pushchair that he refused to leave wollies without. and he played with it non stop for months whilst still being obsessed by all things transport related i.e trains trucks cars etc and is now a firm beleiver in power rangers, scooby doo and all the other "boys" toys

DD 20 months is a real tomboy in as much as she loves being involved and likes nothing more than to slide head first own the garden slide.but she also loves her dolly and pram.

I read and enjoyed that book too.

our local woodcraft folk is full of rather androgynous children. Several children (or Elfins, as we call them ) I thought were girls turned out to be boys. they're all similarly attired with long hair and those hippie conker shoes.