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Behaviour/development

HELP!! 20 Month old pulling her hair out!

3 replies

ChocChoc · 17/05/2006 18:38

Ever since my 20 month old was a few months old she pulled at her hair when she was tired. If any came out she would put it in her mouth. But recently she has started ripping it out in clumps, still putting it in her mouth and now she has no fringe left! Her Daddy is away a lot with work and Im hoping its not anything to do with that, that would make me feel even worse! I couldn't bare the thought of her being upset. Please help??!!

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ggglimpopo · 17/05/2006 19:05

bumping for you

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ggglimpopo · 18/05/2006 13:30

I have been thinking about this chochoc. Habits like this double as comforters - hence when she is tired or upset she may do it - but it does not at all reflect on you as parents, just something she does like sucking her thumb or snuggling a toy. The research says that a child needs to have one significant carer at this age, which is you, and that anyone else is peripheral. Just think how many happy and well balanced children are brought up by single parents and how many little thugs there are where neither parent works and are both around most of the time.

I would suggest distraction or an alternative. You could try introducing a snuggly toy or just simply give her something else to focus on when she starts to do it, without making a fuss. Short hair is much harder to pull out than long hair and this might be something to consider. At her age they still have a very strong hand to mouth reflex and this is why she started to put the hair in her mouth and is still doing it.

I would contact your hv if you get on with her and see if she can give you some help and support in breaking the habit.

Don't beat yourself up about it. She sounds a much loved little girl who has accidentally picked a great way to get attention, whether she needs that attention or not!

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ChocChoc · 19/05/2006 11:27

Thanks for the advice. Will try and give her something to cuddle at night I think as she already has a dummy. Will have a chat with my Health Visitor to see what she can come up with. Thanks for making me feel better about it! x