Oh dear God help. Two year old and newborn. Need I say more?

[mylittlepuds]

Jeeeeeesus. I need my glass of wine tonight. We have a newborn (two weeks) and a toddler (just turned two). His behaviour was never great (not through lack of trying - naughty step etc) but now, dear Lord, it's ramped up ten fold. My DH goes back to work in a week and I need some tactics quick smart.

He is (of course) absolutely wonderful but we do need to get this behaviour sorted - it feels like he has literally tantrumed all day today with spurts of quiet whilst cartoos are on (and I detest him watching too many). He hits other children too...I'm also concerned about our newborn who flinches at his screaming and has to put up with non stop noise until he's in bed.

We do naughty step for two mins religiously. It does calm him down and make him think about his behaviour.

We use distraction. Sometimes works sometimes doesn't.

Bribery. Rarely works.

Getting him to 'help out'. Rarely works.

Any other ideas very welcomed!

I remember those days... ds wasn't particularly aggressive, but bloody hell was he active. I used to take him for 3 hour walks just to wear him down a bit - he was 2.3 when dd was born and it was midwinter 2010 so bloody freezing! I remember sitting in a freezing playground on our own while ds charged around like a loon and I attempted to bf dd through about 15 layers of coats and jumpers. Let me tell you, wind chill on a wet nipple when it's -5 is no laughing matter! Be glad it's nearly summer!

That said another thing I found was keeping the toddler constantly fed helped. At that age they don't know they're hungry, they just get crabby or hyper, or both. Ds was eating something every two hours while he was awake. It was only tiny things... half a banana here, a bread stick there, but it kept him going. He didn't really eat meals at that age, he was far too busy so I just took his meal and spread it out across the day.

Still, poor dd did her fair bit of screaming while I attended to ds's latest crisis. And I always always always made sure I put ds to bed. Dh would take dd for a walk/cuddle/play in hour bouncy chair while I read ds his bedtime story and put him to bed. That was sacrosanct.

Good luck!

Puds I have never felt more of a shit mum than I do atm. I'm finding it bloody hard work. Ds cries more than not which makes dd cry and then I cry so we all cry. I snap and dp and tell him I want to run away dp is only home one day a week and I really resent him for it! Remind me does your ds go to nursery? Dd goes 9-3 Monday and 9-1 Wednesday. It saves me

Bed, there's a newborn feeding every 2hr thread?? I desperately needed that 2 weeks ago!! Lol

After 2 months of daily lactulose ending very badly with suppositories, the gp has finally accepted its a withholding issue not just constipation so has been on movicol for 3 days, so far we still seem to be on a clear out ... So very grim

Yay!!!!!!!!! It's not just meeeee! Ah so glad I started this thread - I have a feeling it's going to feel mighty useful when I want to run away. The advice has been great.

Two months of lactulose . Poor thing, Movicol is much gentler on their poor tums. When my MIL was here a couple of weeks ago we had similar clear out day we named 'poonami day' because between a newborn and DS1, we were unable to leave the house at all because of the amount of nappy changes and baths needed. Even though there were two of us!

Bed I can certainly relate to that!! The number of days out I've had to cancel due to poo days .. Love your name for them!

It's taken me this long to convince the doctors it's not just constipation, I literally was in tears at the gps

Sorry to hijack the thread puds! X

If it's sunny, then blowing bubbles in the garden can be a hit for hours. Actually it's amazing what will occupy a toddler. mine used to love cleaning vegetables in a big bowl of water, or pretending to wash up toys/duplo. Chalk on paving slabs or walls comes off easily with water/rain.

Glad you're feeling a bit better.

No advice but watching this thread feeling a bit scared. 25 weeks pregnant due two days after dd's 2nd birthday..... How long is it hell for?

Beans, that all depends on how many more you have . By the time the younger one is two it's much better, and long before that it's certainly very different. Juggling a one and three year old simultaneously is fun in a whole different way! I've always been pregnant before my youngest has hit two, so then the roller coaster just starts again .

Oh god, this brings it all back. I still have bad days (ds now 3.5, dd 18 months)now but nothing like the dark days, as I used to call them. I've no idea how I survived. Ds1 was a magnificently prolific hitter, even at the park and would scream/run at kids who happened to be on a ride he wanted so getting out and about was always fraught. DD2 was quite poorly in the first few months so, until we found out the cause of that, she used to bfeed constantly for comfort or be screaming. DS was feral, Fireman Sam and Peppa Pig were my only friends and I think I lost a little piece of my life to insanity for that short period of time.

On a positive note, Ds is turning into a very sensitive, caring little boy and he and his sister (who he viciously disliked for quite a while) are, worryingly, thick as thieves at times. As I said, we still have our bad, mad days but it's a big change from even this time last year.

Good luck...hang in there. It will get better.

"The dark days"

Ooh good ideas Shiraz! How many DCs do you have?!

I have 4. Youngest still a baby, but is our last. Will be a bit of a shock when we get through the terrible twos, potty training etc and maybe even get some sleep. We'll have been at this whole preschool bit more than a decade by then! It does get easier, honest. And it is over before you know it. I look at my eldest now and wonder how he got so big.

Echo what every one else says, it does get better....

For a few years........

Then the pre Teen stuff starts........

Then the Teenage stuff.................
which is where I am at the moment...oh the joys of parenthood