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Hearing Problem or Just Selective?

37 replies

MummyBurrows · 17/04/2013 22:26

I apologise in advance for the long post....But please don't judge.....

I have a 3yo DD due to start school this September. Shes incredibly behind on her speech,always has been. She communicates by taking people where she wants them to go to get her things and by making various incoherent noises and babbling away in gibberish....She can say a few words (bye,hi,I see,you,no,yes,oi,wee,mum,mummy,dad,daddy) and she can just about count to 8 although not all the numbers are clear and say a few letters of the alphabet (b,c,d,e,i,o,p,t,u,v). She has once said bless you (when she was in bed and didn't know I was standing outside her door!) and it came out perfectly clear and there have been another couple if times she has come out with a word or 2 completely out the blue but never repeated them since. She also seems to understand (perhaps not entirely) what people are saying to her going by her reactions and she will sometimes respond to noises but not all the time.

My DD is going for a hearing test next week to see if theres a problem with her ears causing her to be soo behind on her speech and her hit and miss responses to noises of varying volume-perhaps hearing the sounds and words muffled,as if underwater-but I was wondering if anyone has had a similar experience with their DC and what the outcome/explanation was?

I personally think that my DD is being selective and choosing not to talk and choosing to ignore noises and that there's nothing wrong with her hearing/ears or anything that could prevent her from communicating like a "normal" child,although I could of course be in denial and not wanting to believe that there could possibly be anything physically wrong with my beloved DD lol..... My DH,and most of our family members,disagree and think its all down to her ears/hearing as both my little sister and my DHs brother both had problems with speech due to ear/hearing problems that were easily solved and rectified with grommets......but I'm seriously not convinced as it really does sound selective to me going by what the nursery staff have told me when they've tried to test her hearing/reactions to loud noises-first time she will look in the direction of the noise and then any times after that she doesn't-and the fact that WHEN my DD does say something (other than numbers) it's crystal clear and there's no debating or guessing what she's just said!

Please don't judge me or my DD. Just want/need some advice/reassurance off people that have had this same,or similar,problem and perhaps some opinions as to what people think the problem could be? Does it sound more selective to u or does it sound like there is something physically wrong with her? T.I.A xx

OP posts:
MummyBurrows · 22/04/2013 19:56

awwwwmannnn Your doctor sounds like a right twat! How on earth is 5times in 6months,hospitalised twice and not being able to speak properly NOT detrimental?! Can't you see a different dr and get a second opinion? I've had to see 3 different gps before I got a good one that listened to me and didn't just palm me off with "kids develop at their own pace,she'll catch up" or "we don't really worry until they start school"!!xx

OP posts:
awwwwmannnn · 22/04/2013 20:47

twat and utter moron i think i called him lol

its just so frustrating as no matter what you say your kind of looked at like a neurotic mother!! i will be seeing a different GP next time i go back, hopefully one that's a bit more understanding. i do appreciate that all children develop at their own pace, but as for waiting til they start school...that's my biggest fear, she'll start school and not be able to fit in or make little friends as she can't talk to them or join in! over my dead body will i let that happen to her.

i just hope that after her appts this weekend something can be done and help will be given to her.

i hope you get things sorted with your DD to and will look out with interest for any developments Smile and Flowers x

awwwwmannnn · 22/04/2013 20:49

twat and utter moron i think i called him lol

its just so frustrating as no matter what you say your kind of looked at like a neurotic mother!! i will be seeing a different GP next time i go back, hopefully one that's a bit more understanding. i do appreciate that all children develop at their own pace, but as for waiting til they start school...that's my biggest fear, she'll start school and not be able to fit in or make little friends as she can't talk to them or join in! over my dead body will i let that happen to her.

i just hope that after her appts this weekend something can be done and help will be given to her.

i hope you get things sorted with your DD to and will look out with interest for any developments Smile and Flowers x

MummyBurrows · 22/04/2013 21:03

Tell me about it! I was getting soo frustrated at the drs fobbing me off so I practically cried when the good one said she would get us referred a priority! My DD is supposed to start school in september but there's no way I could possibly send her if she can't talk and communicate,I feel guilty enough sending her to nursery because she can't really make friends,don't get me wrong,the kids in her room absolutely adore her and are friends with her anyway but it upsets me knowing that she probably can't understand them and can't talk to them :(

Thank you,I hope you get somewhere at the weekend too :) xx

OP posts:
awwwwmannnn · 22/04/2013 21:50

be interesting to see how we both get on....although i'm pretty sure a few months/year down the line we'll be on here reassuring other mums who are going through a similar thing that there is a happy ending and their little ones will end up talking the same as ours will.....Grin x

MummyBurrows · 22/04/2013 22:25

We probably will be lol! There's no bad ending which ever way the tests go,both our DDs will get there in the end,they may struggle a little along the way and maybe need an operation but they have strong determined mummies like us (and daddies too of course!) to help them along the way and be there for them,no matter what xxx

OP posts:
MummyBurrows · 24/04/2013 20:37

Hi everyone!

We got on ok today :) They couldn't complete the hearing test on DD as she kicked off due to not liking having earphones put in her ears but the results the did manage to get pointed to her not having any hearing problems.

They do think she may be on the Autistic Spectrum though so we have a whole new battle on our hands to get her in with paeds and sent for whatever tests she's going to need to get some answers.

DD is booked in for another hearing test at the end of September where they will hopefully be able to conduct the full test with a follow up app with the ENT specialist beginning October.

Looks like DD won't be starting school this September,ENT doesn't think she will be ready or able to communicate enough to cope so he has recommended keeping her on at nursery until at least Christmas or even waiting until September next year as depending on how she progresses as she may need to go to a special needs school and it will take time to get her into our local one. On the plus side,the nursery SENCO (old school friend of dh) is going to do what she can to put a bit of weight/urgency behind our case with the doctor,paeds,speech therapy,ect and her best friend works at our local special needs school so can put add a bit of weight behind our application there if its where our DD would be best educated to cater to her needs if need be :)

XxX

OP posts:
awwwwmannnn · 24/04/2013 22:15

hi, good news about the hearing test @Mummy Grin

what reasons do they give for thinking she is on the autistic spectrum?? nothing in your post suggested autism, is it purely the selective hearing thing?? (not that i'm a doctor or anything, just a little ignorant about these things and wondering if the same thing will be brought up with my DD).

it sounds like things are on the move for you and are now getting some pretty good backing, i truly hope all works out for you and your darling girl..she has a wonderful mummy who will do everything she can for her, she's very lucky as are you!

how do you feel about all this, or is it something you had in your mind anyway?

hope you don't mind me asking, i'm just trying to figure things out with my lil DD and wondering the road ahead will bring.
xxx

awwwwmannnn · 24/04/2013 22:16

what the road ahead will bring is what i meant to say lol x

Beamur · 24/04/2013 22:27

Just to add my pennorth to the hearing bit - I have a lot of tone loss (don't hear high noises) and also deafness (hear very little in my left ear) as a result of nerve damage as a tiny baby.
This was not picked up for years (despite testing me repeatedly as there was some concern for my hearing) - I struggled with making certain sounds when learning to speak but my ability to hear does vary - background noise and such like makes a huge difference.
Luckily, although it wasn't thought to be genetic my DD has had extra hearing tests just to make sure - her hearing thankfully is fine.
The fact my actually quite severe problem was undiagnosed for years, lies partly with how good you become (without trying) at reading other signs, filling in the gaps, lip-reading, etc. I had no idea that anyone else could hear differently to me - I still wonder how the world sounds to other people.
Hope your little girl gets the support she needs OP.

MummyBurrows · 25/04/2013 18:40

The reasons they gave where down to her behaviour regarding how she interacts with people and children,the fact she prefers to play alone so she can do things her way,the way she likes to have things lined up a certain way,does things in a certain order,likes everything to be in its place,the fact she CAN speak clearly when she chooses to say something,the way she's very "hit and miss" when it comes to responding to noises and her name for example,especially if she's busy/distracted by something else...

The ENT obviously doesn't specialise in Autism but knows that some children (and even adults) with autism can struggle with social skills (including talking) and interactions,like things to be in order and become completely focused on one thing/activity and completly ignore everything and anything going on around them so he said the signs are there so it may be worth investigating in the 6months between now and her next hearing test. I guess once he said it,it did kinda make sense....it had fleetingly crossed my mind that she could be autistic or perhaps have a bit of ocd maybe but it never occurred to me that it could affect speech so I never seriously thought about it or thought it could be a possible reason for her being so behind with speech and seemingly ignoring people!

If your dds results come back normal and they suggest something similar to you awwwwmannnn then it may be worth looking into....I'm going to do some research online and see if it sounds like it could well be the route of the problem...I can't say I'm bothered if it is,it just means she will need a bit of extra support and attention to help her bring on her speech and social skills! I know lots of people who's children have various types of autism so I know its nothing to be worried about :)

Xx

OP posts:
awwwwmannnn · 25/04/2013 21:09

have sent PM if that's ok xx

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