do your dc ever talk to you with total lack of respect and rudeness?

[losenotloose]

Please tell me I'm not the only one! I'm sure it's worse when they go back to school.

Just had an argument with 7 year old ds. I said you need to learn to behave blah blah blah, he said "you need to learn to do what I say". It was said with real venom and temper. I sent him straight upstairs and told him he can come down when he drops his attitude.

Why does he think he can speak to me like this, as though I'm the child and he's the adult? He doesn't get away with it and I'm so fed up.

I don't nag, with teenagers many of them can argue for Britain, if not Europe.
Easier just to have simple, clear sanctions and to make it very obvious what they have done wrong. Stick to the point and don't get into long discussions, debates and arguments.
I've got two children,when they were primary age I used to alternate days for choosing what was on TV. They could negotiate, but not swap days.
As for being a mean mummy? It's one of the many hats we get to wear.

I'm constantly told I'm always saying no, and that I'm too strict, the strictest mum in his class apparently!

DS (10 today) has his moments, but in fairness he's usually pretty good at recognising them so what I tend to get is:

Manky attitude
Attitude trails off as he starts to think
"I think I need to go to my room mamá, may I be excused?"

Followed an hour later by an apology and a hug.

That sequence generally doesn't result in a sanction, but I do expect an explanation - usually it's a function of a bad day but occasionally he hasn't been able to work out why he's acted the way he has.

On the rare occasions where he hasn't recognised and corrected it, a mix of cold, calm disapproval and my disappointment at his behaviour works wonders - whatever sanction I impose hurts him less than the belief that he's let me down. I only hope that my good opinion is as important to him in 5 years as it is now!