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2.5 year old Ds bad table manners!

3 replies

sidebysides · 15/04/2013 11:25

My DS did eat nicely. That has now changed. He often refuses to use his spoon (struggles with fork), stuffs in food with hands, puts his feet on the table, swivels around in his chair...endlessly.

We have obviously told him repeatedly what we do/don't want; we've taken him down from the chair if it gets bad; time out if he ignores us and say, for example, throws his food.

But it's not improving. Any tips?

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ReallyTired · 15/04/2013 11:31

What you are describing is part of the terrible two and it will pass. A lot of the behaviour is being done for attention. I think that you are right to end the meal if his behaviour is awful.

I think its important not to make food a battle ground. Don't force him to eat and if he mucks about then end the meal.

I also think you have to pick your battles. Using fingers occassionally to eat at this age is normal, however throwing food, putting feet on the table is unacceptable. A bit of mess at this age is normal, but there is a difference between accidently dropping food on the floor and throwing it.

How is a two a year old able to swivel in a chair? Surely the answer is to have a chair which doesn't turn.

sidebysides · 15/04/2013 11:33

Hi yes, you're right. We need a chair that doesn't swivel. It is a tripp trapp and we took the front off, so now he's far more flexible.

I agree, we shouldn't make it a battle ground. Thanks, good advice.

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matana · 15/04/2013 12:36

And this is the reason i still need the option of strapping my (also 2.5yo) DS in a high chair, despite the disapproving looks from my family who think he should now be out of it. We have begun to use sitting with the adults as a reward, so have started to say "If you can sit nicely, you can sit on a big boy chair". And when he starts doing the things you describe i give him a warning "DS, if you can't sit nicely i will need to strap you in your high chair". If he does it again i make it clear that he has one more chance. And if he chooses to do it again i carry through on the threat. He's now getting there slowly and is actually probably much better when sitting down to a meal with others, on a grown up chair, than eating something on his own. Boredom plays a big part too i think, as well as pushing boundaries. I've also started taking his food away if he starts playing with it - again he gets 3 chances and then it's gone without a fuss. As for using cutlery i just think they're so hungry sometimes that the quickest way is the best - and that's usually shovelling it in with their hands. As they get better at using cutlery, it should resolve. I hope so anyway!

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