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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Health visitor really upset me over babies weight - advice pls???

43 replies

Kellstar83 · 21/03/2013 13:07

Hi ladies

Just had my health visitor round for a general chat about feeding as am weaning my daughter and she offered to drop some info off - anyway she said she would weigh her while she was here and she is 6 months old - weighs 20lb 9oz and is 68cm/27 inches long , she does seem a bit chubby but I thought all babies were at this age??? The health visitor just looked shocked and carried on saying over n over what a big girl she is :(
I know people say once babies start crawling they start slowing down on the weight gain but my daughter has a problem with her arms too and am waiting for a physio appt but due to this she will prob take longer to crawl than most babies
The health visitor has left now and I'm in tears as I've just got her happy to try lots of different solids etc n now I've been made to feel that she's huge :(
Has anyone else had this problem or anyone else got babies about the same age/weight or even bigger??
Wish I'd never let the health visitor come over now - they r supposed to be there to support u and all she's left me feeling is confused and sad :(
Thanks for listening :)

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

KeepCoolCalmAndCollected · 21/03/2013 20:46

You must ignore her and go by your own instincts.

Always a good thing for babies to have a bit extra anyway in case of illness when they don't want to feed/eat for a few days.

My DS was way off the chart and didn't move a lot, but is now a skinny athletic 6 year old.

Nonio · 21/03/2013 20:56

Omg.. I think that the weight graph shoud be burnt. My HV made my life a awful to say the least.
I your LO is happy and doing well enjoy them xx

Gemd81 · 21/03/2013 21:08

I dont really rate HVs it's just weighing for weighings sake I was told the whole time with my first 20 months old now was underweight and was always leaving weigh in in tears to DH - well she's skinny but tears round like a nutter all day so I genuinely dont know where she gets the energy from and she has always been around ninth percentile - and my second has dry skin 1st HV said add olive oil to bath 2nd HV said not to add it to bath as dangerous as baby slippery only to massage it in?! They r so inconsistent I am not sure sure what their training and credentials entails, so as long as you and your baby are happy then bollox to them!

Granitetopping · 21/03/2013 21:10

I wouldn't take much notice of your HV. My son was a tub of lard when he was a baby. He had an enormous appetite and I was regularly bollocked by the HV for over feeding him.

By the time he was 15, he was 6'5"!

Ignore the HV and enjoy your baby. They don't stay babies for very long!

Lozza70 · 21/03/2013 21:10

Don't worry at all. I too have had the eye rolling at the 6 month weigh in mark. Once she has moved to 3 meals a day you can reduce her milk feeds. I moved to 3 feeds at about 7 months, 6 oz morning and night and 3 oz as the morning snack, mid morning. DS2's weight gain has slowed but I seem to have big babies as DS1 was the same and now he is a slim 4 year old. Those weight charts have a lot to answer for!

Svrider · 21/03/2013 21:14

Of course the HV has left you tearful and confused
Tiz in their job description
Hopefully she made you feel inept and a poor parent too??
Oh good, job done!

Seriously tho try not to worry
Do not try to restrict food
It's amazing how much your baby will change once she's crawling about x

Svrider · 21/03/2013 21:16

Also do NOT restrict milk

IrisGirl · 21/03/2013 21:35

bloody health visitors, one of the things they need to be taught more than anything is how to talk to mums without offending....!!

if its helpful, my dd was a right little chunky monkey as a baby (9lb 12ozs) born, for months and months she had the little creases and "bracelets" on her arms...once she was weaned and crawling kicked in, literally within a matter of a month or two you could see her thinning out, by the time she was 11-12months she had lost almost all of her chubbiness and had stretched and thinned out like you wouldn't believe (but still leaving that little bit of cute chubbiness).
please don't worry or stress about your baby's weight, she is perfect and healthy and that's all that matters. if she wants milk, let her have it. as my mum always said to me (when i used to worry about dd's weight), if she's ever poorly for any reason and drops a feed or two, you are not going to be panicking about her dropping a pound or so, she will have it there to lose.
trust me as soon as your little one starts moving around you will see a massive difference and you can tell the hv to behave lol xx

lola88 · 21/03/2013 21:39

my HV gave me the same shite about ds being very big and i'd have to be carefull not to over feed him. He was 7lbs 3oz at birth and just got bigger and bigger he's now a very tall 13mo old i often get comments about how he must eat me out of house and home but he's actually not a huge eater he's just naturally a big boy, people are also saying he's losing his chubby-ness but actually he's not he's just getting taller.

Ignore her as long as she's not vomitting from to much milk then she's fine. I've not seen my HV since DS was 5mo IMO all you get is thier opinion and your better off doing your own research and come to your own decisions about your child.

DuPainDuVinDuFromage · 21/03/2013 21:49

Haven't read all the posts but the hv is talking rubbish - have just checked my little red book and your dc is within the 'normal' range for both height and weight. DD was 6lbs 3oz when she was born (9th percentile), at 5.5 months she is on the 75th percentile for weight and 50th for height - the hv (yesterday, when I got her weighed and measured) said she is within the normal ratio of weight to height.

I have found that some HVs (even the really nice ones!) are often thick as the proverbial and don't really know what they are talking about. Take it all with a pinch of salt and remember: (1) it's very unlikely that a baby can be overweight if you are feeding him/her the right foods once weaned, and (2) [most important] you know your baby better than anyone and your instincts are probably right.

From what everyone says, our DCs will lose plenty of weight once they start crawling anyway.

WaitingForPancakeDay · 21/03/2013 22:11

My DD didn't crawl til she was 8 months so don't think it is because of her arms if it takes a while. Also, babies are dead clever and she'll find other ways to move when she's ready to be mobile. Bum shuffling or commando crawling for example.

The HV sounds rather unthinking. You never know, she may have seen loads of skinny minnies or much younger tiny babies then your gorgeous daughter rocks up and appears so much bigger than the others. She sounds fab, your DD and also, my DD woke for a night feed up to about 10 months consistently, then after that it was more intermittent.

anonymosity · 21/03/2013 23:32

The HV sounds inexperienced. They are only there to check the well being of the baby and the mother and to offer reassurance really. Often I don't think they think before they speak and when you have a small child you are quite vulnerable to perceived criticism.

Ignore it put it away. The truth is you have a healthy bouncing baby who will indeed lose weight when she starts moving around and will probably have minor weight gains just before growth spurts (height). Fret not.

MiaowTheCat · 22/03/2013 09:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Kellstar83 · 24/03/2013 20:34

Thanks ladies for all the replies :) have been having trouble with my Internet but glad to be back on here now :) think I will just ignore what the hv says n carry on giving her what she wants/needs as I feel putting a 6 month old baby on what is basically a diet by restricting her milk intake just seems cruel to me x

OP posts:

fififrog · 24/03/2013 20:51

My DD has been 91st for weight and 75th for height quite often, we have fairly inoffensive HVs here - they had usually said "she's probably about to grow a bit" whenever she's measured like that. Last time I managed to measure her length at about 20 months she was 91st for both. To me she seems quite chubby, but in a nice way, and as others have said when she was ill for a fortnight over Xmas it was a blessed relief as she lost her giant toddler belly almost overnight!

Don't worry - my GP always says "as long as she' happy and doing alright then I don't care what she weighs/eats/whatever the current issue is"

Badmood · 25/03/2013 13:18

Just read through - but someone has to be the biggest, and someone else the smallest.

Same as whilst someone has to be first, inevitably someone will therefore be last.

I hold on to this everytime my child is compared to another. So long as he is happy I can deal with the rest...

anonymosity · 26/03/2013 02:54

5 years ago I had my DD and my friend her her DS. My DD was a rolly polly baby and her DS was almost categorized as "failing to thrive" which upset her no end.

He is now a HUGE boisterous little boy and my DD is a whisp of a girl.

It all pans out in the end.

SofiaAmes · 26/03/2013 03:03

It is so depressing that things haven't changed a bit. My ds is 12 years old and I got the same stupid advice from the hv when he was a baby. He was exclusively bf until 6 months. She advised me to start solids at 4 and put him on a diet because he was too fat. Babies are fat. It's ok. Ds was "chubby" (and I put that in quotes because it's other people's term, not mine) until he was 4 or 5. My dc's were both super round fat babies. I was the fattest baby you have ever seen. I am now 49 and have always been slim. My dc's are both super skinny children. Everyone in my family is healthy thin.

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