How much playing should I be doing with my 3mo DS?

[DangerMousey]

Daft question but it's my first child (obvs!) and I am just wondering how much other people actively play with their 3mo's versus how much time their LOs spend chilling out in their own (in bouncy chair, on playmat etc...actually there is no "etc" that's about it at the moment!).

I really want DS to be stimulated and to be provided with the opportunities to develop his motor skills etc but I am running out of ideas of what to play with him, and feel guilty for just leaving him on his mat or in his chair, whenever I do...but I need to get stuff done round the house and need some time for me too!

DS currently won't sleep for more than 40 mins at a time during the day.

I reckon he is probably in his chair or on his mat for over 50% of his awake time...is that too much?? The rest of the time I am either feeding him, dancin with him, reading him little stories, playing peekaboo in the mirror, this little piggy and other simple games...

Any thoughts much appeeciated!

What you are doing sounds very similar to me with my 9 wk DS. This is my first baby too so I may have this wrong but babies learn from observing their surroundings and watching people and I have noticed that my LO becomes overstimulated if he gets too much interaction with people. It sounds like you have a good range of games for him. You may already have done this but we have a mobile above his playmat and some simple black and white images stuck on the wall for him to look at. Also have you got a baby gym?

Really, don't worry. You don't need to do anything at this age other than respond to their cries by feeding them, changing them, and lots of cuddles and keeping them close. That's all they need.

The outside world is hugely stimulating in itself to them (just imagine what the world is like for a baby). They dont need extra

PS if it makes you feel better my second baby, DS, spent his whole time on a mat or chair, watching me look after his whirlwind sister who was 2. If he cried of course I put him first, but if he was happy, he was essentially sat there observing! He is 16 months now and a very happy chap. Certainly doesn't look like he missed out, he is v similar to DD developmentally and she got a lot more attention.

50% of awake time actively playing with your DS sounds like he is getting lots and lots of lovely attention!

Do you read to him?
My DS is also 3 months old and hardly sleeps in day so I'll put him in his chair to take round the house with me, so I can talk to him while I'm tidying up, making beds etc..
He will play under his play gym for a while. When he is on the floor I'll read him books that are simple but with bright pictures (think the gruffalo) which he smiles along with. He loves looking at my face and the pictures and chats along with me when I read. Also musical toys are quite entertaining.
I don't do these things all day, sometimes he's just content enough to sit in his chair and look around.
Somebody may come and contradict me but I dont think it's too early to do these things with a baby. It's how they learn.
This is also my first!

Ah the first child scenario! With ds1 I felt guilty doing things around the house and 'neglecting' him so spent daft amounts of time dangling little toys at him, putting him on his play mat, singing etc. Dd2 is 4 1/2 months and spends most of the day either in her bouncy chair watching the mayhem that is ds charging about flinging toys everywhere or me attempting to keep the house vaguely clean. Or else in the carseat doing the school run / shopping / taking ds to play centres. We do now have ds's jumperoo set up so she'll sometimes have 15 minutes bouncing in that and I try to put her on her mat for a bit in the evening when ds is in bed and won't accidentally tread on her. She likes toys so I usually give her one to play with in her chair, but my "hands-on" playtime with her is quite small currently, out of necessity. And she is a more contented and placid baby than ds ever was!

There was a thread on here last week I think about someone struggling to get balance right.. I think the key issue was that said child was struggling to sleep. I think there is a real balance to be struck between concept that actually a wee baby can get overstimulated and thus become grumpy, distressed baby.
As mummy2 suggests I think there is an interesting point to be made about baby number 2 and how different that 2nd time around is.

ps - sorry point of my post was to say, don't worry and don't feel guilty, sure you doing fantastic job and if baby content than that's great.

3 months is still so young! Don't worry about stimulating him, obviously it's lovely to read and play with him but you don't have to do very much. At this point the whole world is still a mystery to them!

I was too exhausted to do much with my DS at this age, but I made sure to move him around a lot so he could always observe and interact with different things. He loved his playmat with the hanging animals, he liked watching me cook, or watching the birds out the window.

He's always been happy to play on his own and amuse himself, I don't know whether it helped that I didn't do too much when he was little, or whether I was able to do so little because he was so chilled out. But basically, every child is different, so don't feel like there's some magic balance you have to hit, just do what makes your child happy.