Being driven mad!!!! Should we see a psychologist?

[tazmo]

Dd2 always been rubbish at eating but she is getting worse. She seems to freak when we give her dinner and just cries and asks for treats. She keeps wandering off from the table and cries when doesn't get her own way (eg baby was on a certain seat and she wanted it so trying to deal with her tantrums on not getting her own way for that and trying to interest her in food is hard!). She has seen a dietician but they're not worried as she is gaining weight and developmentally is fine. But even her staples she is not taking (eg she never used to,eat sandwiches but would have the bread. Now she's not even eating the bread). She'll be 3 in may. Have ds1 who is 4 and dd3 who is 8 months. Shd she see a psychologist? Tried all the suggestions given by health visitor.

I think the age of DD3 may be important here. DD2 may be using food and mealtimes as a way of getting attention because she's jealous of the baby - especially as DD3 gets older and is able to interact more with you. Lots of toddlers get fussy about food (my daughter certainly did) and once they know it winds you up, the problems tends to escalate. I would try giving lots of attention outside of mealtimes and ignoring her refusal to eat/bad behaviour at table. If the dietician is not worried about her because she's gaining weight, then you should try not to worry as well. I know it's hard, but you must not let food be a battleground as this only makes it worse. Offer healthy foods at mealtimes and if she won't eat, don't allow snacks etc. in place of a meal. She will be hungry to begin with and will probably tantrum but if you stay strong, she will eventually eat at least some of what's offered. Praise her for anything she does eat and make mealtimes as stressfree as you can. Hope this helps.

What would you regard as not eating? Eg my daughter will have say chips, chicken nuggets, bread and sweet corn on her plate in manageable amounts. She'll say eat the bread only. Would you then let her have anything else? She used to just eat this bit i swear she is getting bored of that even - everything else she simply does not eat - no matter how much we try. She is surviving on cereal, bread, smoothies and crackers. It really is getting ridiculous, no matter how positive we try to be. She'll happily eat crisps and sweets but we have not been letting her have those. I just hope she grows out of it. Don't know whether to,see someone also do believe she is getting scared of dinner time!