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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

How to stop a thumb sucker?

32 replies

Napsalot · 09/03/2013 11:30

I have a 3 year old thumb sucker -took dummy away at 4 months and he found his thumb :-( He sucks it when he is nervous or unsure, when he is thinking, and during sleep. Basically anytime of the night and day!

We are going to embark on eliminating this. Any tips on where to start?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

cathan · 09/03/2013 12:49

Why let it bother you? Both my son and daughter sucked their thumbs and found great comfort in it. Unlike a dummy it's always there and certainly helped when they were tired or frightened or ill - I'm sure we all got more sleep because of this self-comforting habit. We certainly never made an issue out of
it or tried to stop them. They both gave it up for themselves by age 7/8 years. Also, they sucked less and less in public as they got older and certainly never sucked at school (I think they realised they might be teased). Hope this helps reassure you that thumb-sucking is nothing to worry about!

Keepmumshesnotsodumb · 09/03/2013 13:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThePigOfHappiness · 09/03/2013 13:11

I sucked my thumb as a kid, until I got my braces off at 18. There was nothing anyone could have said or done to get me to stop!

Why is it an issue? He's still very little.

NotADragonOfSoup · 09/03/2013 13:14

DSs orthodontist recommends long rugby type socks on both arms at night, under PJs.

Thumbsucking wrecked DS1's teeth and jaws and has done the same to DDs. DD (7) starts orthodontic treatment next week to fix the damage.

DeepRedBetty · 09/03/2013 13:18

dd1 sucked her thumb until she was 8. Her teeth have settled back down now and dentist sees no need for braces/orthodontic work. We tried that stuff that makes your nails taste bitter, without success, when she was six, but it was peer pressure that stopped her in the end - apparently she was teased about it at school, so she stopped.

evertonmint · 09/03/2013 13:26

My DS is 5 this month and still sucks his thumb when tired or upset. Self soothing has been such a good thing for him that I haven't wanted to stop him. I'm conscious of the dental damage that can be done though but our dentist has reassured me his teeth and jaw look undamaged at the moment. He has recommended we start to encourage him to cut back in a year or so, but has no major worries about him thumb sucking for now.

DS sucks thumb at school sometimes, particularly in early days of reception when tired or uncertain, but nobody has ever commented to him, or at least he has never been bothered if they have!

If worried I would get a dentist to check him out first before you decide what to do.

My DD is 2.5 and a big thumb sucker. As with DS the advantages currently well outweigh the disadvantages. It's so helpful for them to suck their thumb and I would hate to take that away from them before they're ready if there is no problem with their teeth.

ZuleikaD · 09/03/2013 18:14

Why bother? DH still sucks his at age 35 - I'm envious sometimes as he finds it a lot easier to get to sleep than I do! Dentists are fond of saying it wrecks teeth, but it depends on the child and the frequency. Your DS will go to school soon and have other things to do with his hands.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 09/03/2013 18:21

Well I used that'd stuff u paint on nails. Not "stop n grow" but another one that boots sold began with "M" I think. Was way better as it would survive hand washing and all night but u have to use it religiously and even for several weeks after thAy appear to stop. Previously I had tried plasters on thumbs, time out, taping socks on hands over night and the dentist wouldn't help as she was to young. Get painting!!! :)

NotADragonOfSoup · 09/03/2013 18:54

Why bother?

Because, Zuleika, it wrecks teeth and jaws. Do you think dentists say it for fun?

DSs orthodontist explained it in great depth.

TheAccidentalExhibitionist · 09/03/2013 19:02

I used to suck my thumb and it hasn't wrecked my teeth or jaws
If you feel strongly how about a reward chart? Personally I think he's still very young to worry abut this yet.

RB68 · 09/03/2013 19:06

I have a thumb sucker and whist the dentist is saying ooh no no no I had bucked teeth as did my mother and we never thumb-sucked so I think sometimes they are blaming the thumb when actually its hereditary and possibly slightly exaggerated by the thumb sucking as teeth do move easily. DD is 7.5 and we only have the bottom two teeth through so far and only just a slight looseness on the top ones at the moment. Thumb sucking is confined to going off to sleep, I have discouraged it daytime since age around 3/4 and its connected with use of a muzzy so when that is not around she doesn't do it

breatheslowly · 09/03/2013 19:09

I've got a 2.5 yo thumbsucker and our dentist has said it needs to stop by 3, so I am watching with interest.

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 09/03/2013 19:19

For all those who feel its harmless my brother spent years sucking his fist and had to wear the worst braces ever to try and straighten the teeth out again. He also paid for surgery in his 20s to correct his jaw. It required him to have his jaw wired and living of protein shakes.

RayofSun · 09/03/2013 19:30

Thumb sucking will only be detrimental to the teeth once the adult teeth come through. This is usually around 6. It can cause reversible and irreversibly damage to your teeth depending on the frequency and duration. I would advise trying to stop by age 5ish to anticipate any prolonged battles! Incidentally, I also met and orthopaedic surgeon who says it can also cause thumb and finger deformities if not careful!! Depending on the age of a child, we recommend using fabric Elastoplast (assuming no allergies to plasters) wrapped around the offending digit every day/ night for a minimum of 6 weeks. Usually works a treat!

evertonmint · 09/03/2013 19:53

I don't think it's always harmless, but nor do I think parents should take certain comfort away from a 3yo child now just because of what may happen in the future. Which is why I think the sensible thing is to talk to the dentist about what is happening now, not what may happen in a few years time, and get them to keep an eye on it. For every person who has to drink through a straw, there are plenty who don't have to go through that. And equally there are plenty of non thumb suckers who need orthodontic treatment. Thumbs can be but may not be to blame. But they definitely do comfort thumbsucking children. I think you have to balance the positives and negatives, not make a drastic, potentially very upsetting decision based on a worst case which may not happen.

SuckingDiesel · 09/03/2013 19:56

I sucked my thumb til I was 20. My brother sucked his til he was about 12. Neither of us have needed orthodontic work. Our teeth are fine. My 8 month old DD is a thumb sucker. I'm not inclined to dissuade her as she self settles well and is very content.

Original poster

Napsalot · 10/03/2013 02:31

Thanks for your replies.

I can already see that DC teeth are pushed out (top and bottom) from the thumb sucking. I would rather start working on breaking this habit now than dealing with potential teeth issues later. (GP has recommended around the age of 3 to start working on this and dentist has said before permanent teeth come through).

Even if I can get DC to limit it to bedtime that would be a good first step I think.

OP posts:

ZuleikaD · 10/03/2013 06:10

NotADragon it does not inevitably wreck teeth and jaws - in fact in the majority of cases there is no damage at all and in plenty of other cases it's pure coincidence that there's thumbsucking and orthodontic work. For something that's not remotely inevitable I wouldn't interfere with a child's ability to self-soothe.

Maisieskates · 10/03/2013 09:59

I have a two year old thumb sucker who has a deformed thumb with another infected blister and is on antibiotics again. We've not done anything about stopping her in the past but I feel now we have to at least try and get her to stop. She is old enough to see the problem its causing and understands that her thumb hurts because she sucks it. We need to let this infection heal before trying any barriers but I will be giving fabric plasters a go to start with along with the nail polish stuff. She doesn't have any soft toys in bed but I'm going to let her chose and buy one that she can have as a replacement comforter. She also sucks her thumb when snuggled up with me but I've already got her to understand that story reading (or whatever) stops as soon as the thumb goes in. I have seen plastic thumb guards online that are silly money and hopefully wont have to go down that road.

BertieBotts · 10/03/2013 10:04

I think the teeth thing is bollocks TBH. Anecdotal evidence but the amount of people I know who needed a brace and the amount of people who sucked their thumbs doesn't correlate.

I wouldn't make an issue of it. My parents did and it just made me want to do it more. I probably would have stopped by myself otherwise as I remember not feeling I needed it any more.

breatheslowly · 10/03/2013 12:15

I don't agree. At 2.5 you can see that DD's top teeth are pulled forward and the shape of her jaw is altered and her bottom teeth and jaw are pushed back.

She will almost certainly need orthodontics anyway as DH and I have had them for overcrowded teeth. But the type of orthodontics she will require if we don't stop her sucking her thumb will be of a different magnitude as they will need to alter the shape of her jaws, not just move her teeth around. That means things like wearing headgear.

I agree that making a big thing of it may not work, but we will have to find a solution somehow.

Original poster

Napsalot · 10/03/2013 12:47

Thanks for your thoughts everyone -whilst I appreciate the points being raised, I wasn't looking to start a debate on the merits of self-soothing, just looking for practical ideas. I will be keeping a close eye on how DC does as we start this process.

Thanks again.

OP posts:

becko · 10/03/2013 14:45

My dentist suggested stopping my dd sucking her thumb by the age of 4. We succeeded with a bribe of a princess dress, together with plasters, pink nail varnish and the bitter tasting stuff. I also think dd was just ready to give up. Down side is it takes her longer to settle now but it is early days. Good luck. I personally am glad we have stopped the habit.

cloudhands · 10/03/2013 15:38

it's interesting that you've noticed the emotional reasons your son sucks your thumb, and you can help him to stop by connecting with him, and help him deal with his feelings.

this article gives you a different viewpoint to the posters here. And it offers a way to help your child that really works!

Thumb sucking article

the jist of the article, is that thumb sucking or a dummy, are things children do to supress their emotions. The article explains ways that you can connect with your child, offering warmth and playfullness, so that they won't need to suck their thumb.
It also explains that crying is a natural healing mechanism, tears contain the stress hormone cortisol, so giving a child a dummy or using some other way to stop the crying or distract a child from crying, can actually cause them to supress their emotions.

dyzzidi · 10/03/2013 15:46

Dd was a thumb sucker and we just asked her to stop doing it during the day as she was a big girl. We talked about it and agreed that if she wanted to suck her thumb during the day she was to go and have a few minutes on the bed with her comfort teddy bear and the stop when she came back downstairs.

We didn't want to tell her it was wrong so this was a easy compromise for her/ us. We also told her that if we were out she waste sit on my knee if she wanted a suck.

As she was /is very active she just didn't bother going upstairs or sitting on my knee during the day so basically restricted herself. She as about three when this happened. I never tried to stop her at bedtime but to be honest she dropped this not long after the day restrictions.

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