DS being so bloody stubborn and emotional!

[Moominsarehippos]

I have told him a million times not to rise to teasing, that getting wound up only makes the winder wind up the windee even more, but will he listen?

He was so excited about a play date. They are good friends and the pal is a nice boy, although he can wind up for England. After a sticky start (little cousin was visiting and Godzilla-ed a Lego car he'd made) he was ok after he'd had a bit of a strop and DBIL took him aside to calm him down.

So it was fine (with a little bossing on the side of DS, the other boy is more forceful/pushy to get his own way) until dinner when I'm not sure what happened exactly, but the gist of it was DS almost slid off his chair. Friend gaffawed, DS said it wasn't funny, friend guffawed more/louder, DS wasn't amused to tried to shove friend. I had tried to make light of it but failed miserably.

Friend was pouring cream at the time, so a small spill went on the table. DS was less amused. I cleaned up. Friend started doing a wind up as DS was acting like a complete dill. Whole load of cream got spilled over tablecloth. I took DS (who was raging by then) off to another room to, calm him down which he seemed to (almost) do.

Friend did something 'disgusting' to annoy DS (I think it involved taking a mouthful of pudding and squeezing it between his teeth as if to spit it out). DS incandescent with rage. DS gets so angry he vomits. Lots of vomit (in the loo thankfully). Friend is a sweet kid really is very concerned.

I am raging! I have told DS so many times that of he gets wound up, kids will make sport of him. I'm more worried that he will get some shitty nickname and possibly bullied.

He is the nicest natured kid, but bloody hell, as stubborn as a mule. He is slow to wind up, but when he does, there is no stopping him.

I have spoken to him about it now that friend has gone. He concedes that he should have laughed off nearly falling off the chair, and not told his friend that he 'always ruins everything'. But I know next time the red mist descends, it will be the same thing.

How can I get him to drop anchor when he's in full sail?

Introduce him to gentle teasing at your own expense my DD used to become incandescent if laughed at until I started laughing at myself my name was silly mummy for years. Also there was a great series of books about feelings from usborne try and check them out good luck x

Sadly I was/am the youngest in a very large family, who mostly all teased/bullied the hell out of me when I was small. They used to try to see who could make me scream.

Ok, so I wasn't fast on the uptake of the 'fuck 'em' mentality and although I am very very slow to really anger (I grumble like alf garnett without the racism/sexist) when I get a rage, I stay rageing for days! DH is the opposite - quick temper but like a firework (big bang, then gone completely).

It looks like DS has my slow to anger part, and fortunately he doesn't get as wound up as I used to get when I was little. I don't want him to lose friends or give up trying to make them of they tease (as lots of kids do).