Aggressive Toddler

[janey77]

Hi all, has anyone got any advice regarding an aggressive two year old girl? I've tried taking away toys, turning TV off, restraining her, reacting and not reacting but nothing seems to stop her behaviour towards me mainly , although I have caught her a couple of times at playgroup hitting other kids. If I haven't got a black eye tomorrow I'll be amazed, so any advice would be appreciated!

When you ask her what she has done wrong she will tell you, but won't tell you why or just laughs in your face. I'm worried she is showing sociopathic tendencies :(

How long has it been going on for? My 2 year old DS went through a very small stage of this as he didn't realise he was hurting you-when his brother cried he then cried. Have you explained that it hurts Mummy (and believe me I know it's hard to stay calm and not shout)? Also, have you tried time out/naughty step? My DS responds well to that as it makes him calm down (although sometimes needs to be 'hugged' onto the naughty step) and then when we finish we distract onto something else. Another thought is, ask the playgroup as I'd imagine they deal with it in which case you could copy their behaviour/system. Good luck!

She's been like this on and off with me since she was about 15 months old, used to be pinching and scratching (I've walked round looking like I've had a fight with Wolverine before now!) but now she's bigger and stronger and its punching and kicking, normally out of the blue when we've been having a nice day. Naughty step doesn't work, she loves sitting on the stairs for some reason, but thanks for the tip about asking playgroup, hadn't thought of that :-)

Can she still be 'contained' in a cot or highchair? We used to strap DS into his highchair when he was being 'physical' and that made him scream then calm down (always moved highchair into living room so he knew when he was in it for good or bad reasons). When it got too difficult to get him in (him stronger, me pregnant and tired!) we moved to the step. He liked it til he realised he wasn't allowed off and it did/does calm him down. Also, have you read Toddler Training? I only read a little (I'm really lucky that apart from 'toddler behaviour' he takes after placid Daddy) but what stuck was if it gets really bad go out for a walk as the difference helps.

Think I will try the highchair thing next time, containing her in her cot works for her dad but not for me (typical!). Not read Toddler Training but think I shall get myself a copy pretty sharpish!