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Behaviour/development

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Empathy. (Long, sorry)

1 reply

OhMyNoReally · 05/02/2013 23:59

Just a quick concern my 4.5 yr old ds, 2nd dc out of 4 doesn't show signs of empathy and he never has. Not like my youngest or eldest dc were.

He doesn't seem to notice things around him like if someone cries, and he shows little interest in other people and how they may be feeling. He also laughs if he's made someone sad or if he doesn't know how to be in a situation. Is this a learning cue, is he uncomfortable and is laughing as he doesn't know how to react appropriately?

He also has an imaginary doggy that seems to be pet animal sometimes and person in dog costume at other times. I was wondering if he could be using imaginary doggy to practice empathy as doggy as a pet makes him happy and person doggy usually annoys and upsets him.

I know empathy is learnt and we are teaching him but he struggles to listen and make eye contact, so I'm not sure how much he's picking up. We never had to teach the other dc the cues they just picked them up, but ds struggles.

So is this behaviour normal? We are using books and taking cues from him and from house situations like an upset sibling and when he's happy or sad to try and teach empathy and emotions. It will develop wont it. He is such a lovely boy one to one but struggles to find his place and gets quite frustrated in family or group situations and I'm sure if he was better with emotions and empathy that would help him.

I'm worried and upset that I've missed something with ds, so please does anyone know when children should have a reached this developmental stage, I really love him and I'm worried about him. Thanks.

OP posts:
anonymosity · 06/02/2013 03:46

It sounds like you're doing your best to help your child - and your own empathy towards him is the perfect role model. I am sorry not to be more constructive in my post - I just didn't want to leave yours unanswered. I don't know if there is a developmental psychologist you can access via your GP or school? That might be a good place for advice / opinions in RL where they can meet with and talk directly with your child.

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