Help - 8 week old won't sleep and cries herself horse

Chocolateyclaire76 · 2013-01-17T20:26:32+00:00

My little girl has always cried a lot since birth but at 8 weeks it just seems to be getting worse. She will only nap during the day either on me, making them short lived as she fidgets, or in the pram when on the move which can only be for so long. Then at night she will scream and scream when put down. We used to give in and bring her in with us but she doesn't even sleep then. I'm currently breastfeeding and we supplement with 1 bottle of formula at night but that makes no difference with regards to sleep. The doctor said a few weeks ago she had colic and each night she kicks, flails her arms around, strains and wails. We've tried everything (tilted mattress / burping / patting and shhh shhh etc) and nothing makes a blind bit of difference. We're now genuinely concerned about her lack of sleep and what the horse screaming is doing to her throat. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

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ScalesAndMirrorsLie · 17/01/2013 20:31

Are you treating the colic?
Do you think the formula might be making her like this?

And formula doesn't make babies sleep, it's a myth (unfortunately )

ScalesAndMirrorsLie · 17/01/2013 20:34

I think it's also perfectly normal for an 8 week old to want to sleep with you.
Our dc3 is 8 weeks old and he's asleep within minutes if putting him in my chest. Give her the cuddles she needs at the moment, ages still very, very young.

He also naps during the day, no big sleeps.

Do you think he wants more breast milk and that's why he's crying?

SoftSheen · 17/01/2013 20:46

Have you tried breastfeeding her to sleep, then cuddling for about 20 min so that she is in a very deep sleep before you put her down? Remember breastfeeding is comfort as well as food, and the comfort aspect is very important for such a young baby.

Perhaps a sling might help during the day? This was the only way my DD would take proper naps when she was tiny.

This phase will pass, apparently crying tends to reach a peak at about 6-8 weeks so hopefully things will start to get better soon :)

Fairylea · 17/01/2013 20:51

Are you breastfeeding on demand at night? Stupid question but just wondered.... every time she's crying I would offer a feed (I formula fed mine on demand and would always feed even if they woke an hour later than the last feed) ... I don't know how dummies work with breastfeeding but I'd offer a dummy if dd / ds wasn't interested in milk.

Swaddling in muslins (large ones from eBay) seemed to help lots too. Swaddle before feeding and then put them down still wrapped up with a dummy worked magic for me for a while.... then moved on to sleeping bags around 3-4months.

Also have you looked into reflux and silent reflux? You can get medications for these from your GP, might be worth considering.

Sorry if any of this sounds really patronising .. just brain storming.

Zavi · 17/01/2013 21:01

Sounds like colic - poor thing

My DC had colic at about the same age. I had been feeding him on demand. HV advised spacing feeds out to 3 hrly. It was very, very difficult to do that at first. But we followed the advice - strictly - and it worked a treat. Within a week the colic had cleared up completely and we never looked back.

Also, although it WAS difficult to space the feeds out at first, it was not nearly as hard as watching my DC scream in pain from colic.

PurplePidjin · 17/01/2013 21:05

I'm doing what SoftSheen says with ds (born 19/11) plus bucketloads of gripe water. He's slept 9ish to 2ish then 3ish to 5ish and 6ish to 8ish pretty much consistently for the last 3 1/2 weeks. He sleeps on his front in the crib, wakes and screams within minutes if put on his back.

During the day is harder, but he'll drop off in the sling (wrap type, very snuggly) and often stay there for 3 hours.

This too shall pass

CantSleepWontSleep · 17/01/2013 21:07

Have you considered that she might be milk intolerant? (A lot of colic is actually thought to be caused by this)

My dd didn't sleep and cried/screamed pretty much all the time until I gave up eating dairy completely myself (I was bf'ing her). I would recommend giving it a try, because you really have nothing to lose, and could have a lot to gain! If you do, then please be aware that it can take up to 2 weeks to clear all of the milk from your/her bodies, so don't be put off if she is still bad for a while (my dd (and ds1 who had the same problem) were really bad on the 4th day after I gave up, but starting to show big improvements by about day 10). You will need to stop the formula as well though, as that is made from cow's milk. If you do conclude that she is milk intolerant, then your GP can prescribe a hypoallergenic formula if you want to continue with mix feeding.

elvislives2012 · 17/01/2013 21:08

How was the birth? Only asking because I swore by having cranial osteopathy for DD when she was born. Helped crying, latching and hiccups as they also did osteopathy on her chest and back.
Agree about swaddling as I found that really useful too

RecklessRat · 18/01/2013 00:15

This sounds exactly like my DD - who has silent reflux.

The GP told us it was colic to start ith and prescribed Infacol, which made her worse. We got a second opinion from a more experienced childrens GP, who diagnosed silent reflux. We're trying to manage it now with Infant Gaviscon and she's much improved. I had some awful sleepless screaming nights with her though - and she still does the writhing, squirming, grunting thing. Does your DD ever pull away from the breast crying? This could be another sign; it was for us.

Our DD became hoarse too - we thought it was because she'd cried so much, but in fact it was the acid burning her throat.

Go back and see your doctor again - too often they seem to say "colic" without troubling to discuss fully or examine properly.

Good Luck. Silent reflux is awful for them and very stressful to deal with.

Original poster

Chocolateyclaire76 · 18/01/2013 15:47

We're treating the colic with infacol and gripe water and have done for the past 3 weeks but they don't seem to have helped. As for swaddling, she had an absolute fit and screamed till she was red in the face! I've tried feeding her and letting her sleep in my arms until gradually putting her down which can work but she'll only sleep for a couple of hours and for some reason this doesn't work after midnight - grrrr!

I'm thinking of switching to formula as she snacks at breastfeeding therefore it's impossible to keep track and create a routine. I know this sounds bad but my sanity needs a routine now and I desperately need other people to be able to help with the feeds as she has physically drained me.

I'm going to the doctors on Monday and will ask about silent reflux. In the meantime we'll just muddle through and cross our fingers every night that we'll get more than 2 hrs sleep!

OP posts:

PurplePidjin · 18/01/2013 16:05

She's only 8 weeks old, and you've (we've) only had 8 weeks practice at being her (their) mummy(ies) :) cut yourself some slack, feet up on the sofa with a hot chocolate and maybe express some off so your dp/mum/best mate can give you an hour in the bath with a book.

You don't have to be Super Mum

DrMcDreamysWife · 18/01/2013 16:15

Loads of good advice here. My dd was like this at 8 weeks, in the day the only naps were on the move as you say or in a sling. The other thing that has been a life saver is white noise. I have an app on my phone and the sound is extreme rainfall. Sounds awful to me but it works and she goes to sleep quite quickly for naps now. At night I just kept feeding on demand and yes she slept on us a lot. ( she's now 18 weeks and usually in cot but I think was cold last night so refused and we were back to shifts of sleeping on us :()

Shes still little at 8 weeks and if it is colic I think 8 weeks is usually the peak and by 12 they tend to settle better, can bring up wind better themselves and are just generally more used to the world!

Hang in there!

AnitaBlake · 18/01/2013 16:22

Second PurplePidjin. Please try and relax, your jib is to look after your baby, everything else can wait, seriously.

I could have easily written your post with DD1, who is now two. Look at the whole of your baby and piece together the evidence. Is there a rash, at all? Even if you've been told its nothing note it down. Vomiting, lots of powder, drooling? Note it down. What about feeds, screaming at the breast, arching back, not latching on properly? Poos, what colour, frequency etc. any snottiness? Conjunctivitis? Anything like that?

Now, call your HV and get a home visit. Give her your list of symptoms and talk it through. They have a lot more time than a GP does and mine saved my sanity.

Call one of the BF helplines and chat to them too. LLL did a lot to keep me sane.

You know your baby best. You need to trust that instinct, and get help for them. Don't be fibbed off, stay strong and determined.

PS turned out my DD was dairy allergic so the formula everyone suggested would have made her worse. Once she got what she needed she turned from a demon to an angel, and DD2 has been the same.

Original poster

Chocolateyclaire76 · 18/01/2013 16:34

Thanks everyone for the advice, it really is appreciated and it's nice to know I'm not alone!

I think I need to relax and stop obsessing about as like you all say, she is only 8 weeks! I guess I need to grin and bare the minimal sleep and remind myself it will get better and as for introducing formula - I shouldn't beat myself up about that either (deep sigh!).

I'll also speak to the HV and doc just in case.

Right, deep breath and let's prepare for tonights shenanigans!

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meganw · 18/01/2013 19:36

Hi, I know someone has already said this but I took my DD to a cranial osteopath when she was about 5 weeks old, as all she did was cry and not settle to sleep. I was VERY dubious about this, but it was absolutely brilliant. It wasn't an instant solution, but gradually she got better, her digestive system improved a bit and after the second session she was like a different baby. She is now almost ten weeks, and she naps better, settles to sleep by herself (after a little bit of crying), feeds well and seems much happier. She still cries quite a bit but she's a baby!

Also, is she possibly overtired? I was always letting my daughter get overtired unintentionally, by waiting for her to cry before trying to settle her for a sleep. Now, once she has yawned twice I pick her up, have a little cuddle and put her down for a nap.

meganw · 18/01/2013 19:38

Hi, I know someone has already said this but I took my DD to a cranial osteopath when she was about 5 weeks old, as all she did was cry and not settle to sleep. I was VERY dubious about this, but it was absolutely brilliant. It wasn't an instant solution, but gradually she got better, her digestive system improved a bit and after the second session she was like a different baby. She is now almost ten weeks, and she naps better, settles to sleep by herself (after a little bit of crying), feeds well and seems much happier. She still cries quite a bit but she's a baby!

Also, is she possibly overtired? I was always letting my daughter get overtired unintentionally, by waiting for her to cry before trying to settle her for a sleep. Now, once she has yawned twice I pick her up, have a little cuddle and put her down for a nap.

Original poster

Chocolateyclaire76 · 18/01/2013 20:39

I've tried cranial osteopathy and after 4 sessions there was no difference unfortunately. I do think she may be over tired but it's so hard when she won't take proper naps during the day. The only way she would sleep today was if we went out so I had to drag the pram through a foot of snow whilst I froze my arse off. I managed 50 mins and came home only for her to wake up again! Then she's over tired and it all just becomes one rather large vicious circle! I'm hoping her age has got something to do with it and it will gradually get better!

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capecath · 18/01/2013 20:57

Hey, I do think this could be largely an age thing which will pass. I'm part of a group of mums with babies born in Aug last year (DS2 is now 5 months) and most had sleep issues around that stage, many still do (including us, but he is now going for 4 hour stretches generally which is a lot better, and naps are improving too). DS1 was very similar and he has been a really great sleeper since about 10 months old. DS2 seems to get a lot of wind and I am always needing to burp him. He also throws up lots and I think he does have reflux. For him, sleeplessness did seem to peak about 8-10 weeks (and around Christmas when we started some solids and a bit of formula which helped a little) so hopefully this will be the case for you too. Having a baby is really quite a shock to the system - I think they cry a whole lot more than we realise (or remember...). I remember thinking they'd somehow fit into a routine with ease. But then they haven't read the textbook and like to do things their own way:) Hope you get some sleep soon x